Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Do Real Men Shop for Hallmark Cards?

Winner, Winner & Winners!

Okay, since I had such a great response, pulling just one winner was hard. But . . . because I only have one ARC to spare at this time, I decided to pick one winner of the ARC and then offer 5 second place winners which can choose from my past releases.

The BIG WINNER—not in pant size—is: PAM.

The four second places winners are: Mary Ann Christian, Liz Kreger, Lois, Sabine G, and Beth Watson.

Please contact me at christie (at) christie-craig (dot) com. Second places winners email me which book you would like to receive.

And just for your FYI, I will be giving away three “early copies” ( in November) of Divorced, Desperate and Deceived to three people who belong to my newsletter group. So pop over to my website(www.christie-craig.com) and join my newsletter group for a chance to win.

P.S. I only send out a newsletters when a book is about to be released.

Congrats and thank you everyone who posted. It was fun hearing about your thoughts on men and cards



CONTEST! CONTEST! CONTEST!

I just got my ARCs, advanced reader copies, of my November 24th release of Divorced, Desperate and Deceived and today one lucky commenter will win a copy. So don’t forget to post a comment!


Do Real Men Shop for Hallmark Cards? You noticed I wrote, “shop for” and not buy, right? Why? Because honestly, I’ve gotten some heart-tugging, couldn’t-be-more-perfect Hallmark cards from my hubby. So I know he’s capable of buying them, I’m just questioning if he really shopped for them.

Or did he walk into the store, go to the cheaper card section, spot the one that had the least amount of cards left in the little slot, meaning it had to contain the best sentimental mush that could fit more people’s lives, and he slapped down his two bucks. (Yeah, he’s frugal on cards.) Nevertheless, the man got lucky and the card’s message was just sentimental enough that I was convinced that he stood for hours in front of the card stand, shopping like a woman, looking for the card that said just the right thing.

You may be wondering what brought on my sudden doubt. Yup, hubby messed up again. Last week was my son-in-law’s birthday. Now, like all women, I had to figure out what we were going to get this much loved new family member. And I’ll be honest with you, I cheat on whole “surprise” kind of gifts. You see, my daughter and son-in-law are new parents and new home-owners and money’s tight for them. So instead of buying him a complete surprise gift, I pick up the phone and talk to my daughter and ask. “What does he want?”

I mean, when times are tough you always have things you really want and getting some weird shirt that your mother-in-law bought you that you can’t take back because it might hurt her feelings is just not right. So I’ve learned to ask.

I was told he wanted a gift certificate to a kayak place. Now, I got the gift certificate, but not wanting to just give a piece of paper, I went out and bought a nice bottle of red wine, which I know he likes, two different kinds of chocolate, which I know he likes, a gift certificate to a nice restaurant, which I know he likes, and a seventy-six pack of diapers. Hey, I think he really liked them, too, because we all know how expensive it can get buying diapers. But it was funny seeing his face when he opened them.

Needless to say, as my hubby and I left the store with all the gifts, I realized I hadn’t picked up a card. So, I turned to hubby and said, “When you pick up the French bread tomorrow, you can grab a card.”

You’d have thought I’d just asked him to rip off one of his boys and feed to it to a stray cat. “Oh, hell no! I’m not shopping for a card.” We argued a bit, but he was adamant and informed me, “I would rather give him a five dollar bill than have to buy a card.” Knowing how hard it is for my frugal hubby to let go of his five dollar bills, I said, “Fine. Don’t buy the card, but if you come home tomorrow without one, I’ll just put your five dollar bill in an envelope and give it to him.”

I was slightly shocked when the next morning, hubby returned from the store with French bread and whipped out the five dollar bill. So I did just what I said, I put the five dollar bill in an envelope and before my son-in-law opened it, I explained my hubby’s male abhorrence to shopping for cards. Much to my dismay, instead of being insulted that his father-in-law thought so little of him, he made him promise to always be the one shopping for his birthday card. I was tempted to take back my diapers.

What is it with men? Where is their sentimental spirit? Do they have none? Is showing a little love in the way of words so hard? I’ll admit I was concerned, but then hubby managed to get himself of the dog house.

Yesterday, hubby and I were sitting at the car dealership waiting for them to bring around my car that had needed a few things repaired. Hubby was talking about some guy at work, complaining about his wife and then he stopped mid-sentence and said, “You know, I seldom have to complain about you.”
My first thought was . . . Seldom?
He studied me for a minute and said, “Have I told you I love you lately? Sometimes I think I take you for granted.”

My heart did one of those big sighs. It wasn’t fancy words, or poetry. It didn’t cost him a buck ninety-nine; it wasn’t five dollars in an envelope and didn’t require he risk his masculinity by shopping for the right words, he didn't lose a testicle in the process, but I knew right then, this was better than a Hallmark card.

Men, they really may be from Mars, ladies, but sometimes, every blue moon, just when we are about to give up on them, they do manage to say or do the right thing at the craziest of moments.

So tell me, does your man shop for Hallmark cards? What has he said or done lately that made your heart sigh? How does he say I love you, without using those fancy words? Is it taking out the trash? Filling your car with gas? And have you told him you love him lately? Go ahead and try it, if nothing else, it may make them wonder what you’re up to.

Remember, one lucky commenter is going to win an early copy of my book, Divorced, Desperate and Deceived. Comment away.

Crime Scene Christie

64 comments:

Emmanuelle said...

My man would never buy a Hallmark card, really not his thing. I can't remember him being extra romantic with words. Of course we say I love yous all the time (like before saying goodbye on the phone) but he isn't a real poet if you know what I mean.
He's a guy who will show me he loves me (and not only after 10 pm). Just this week-end I made him change our dining room wall paper... he did a great job, JUST FOR ME (cause HE really needn't change this "perfectly fine paper). lol

Now seriously, about this contest of yours...
Pick me, Pick me, Pick me !!!
;-)
I'm a bit behind I know. Only read Gotcha last week and Divorced, Despearte and Dating was just in the mail yesterday (it sucks to be in France really !).
So pleaeeeeeeaaaase count me in !!

Elle J Rossi said...

Ooo, ooo! Pick me!

Actually, my husband does shop for cards. I can tell he spends a long time picking out the right one. Poor him. I say this because I really don't like cards. I know I'm odd. I'm okay with that. But a card is one of those things you look at, smile and then...then what. Me, I drop it in the trash as soon as he's not looking. You're probably shaking your head. But I can't help it. What are you supposed to do with them. Trust me, the house is full of enough clutter and papers (all his)!

I always feel a little guilty but I think I may be more like your son-in-law. Just give me the 5 bucks. If Kohl's is having a really good sale, I may be able to get a shirt!

Have a great day,
Justen writing as Elle J Rossi

Christie Craig said...

Emmanuelle,

Changing perfectly good wallpaper is a sure sign of love!!!

Though I have to tell you that I wouldn't allow hubby to do that. He did it once and well, every time I walked in the room I had to hold my head a little sideways because the paper was crooked.

Thanks so much for popping in.

CC

Christie Craig said...

Elle,

Okay, I'm laughing girl. Don't worry, we won't beat you up too bad. Actually, I'll admit that I don't keep all my cards, just the perfect ones.

I just got a great card from my mom. It has a cat on it. It says, "You are there, and I'm here." And when you open it up, it makes the sound of cat tossing up a hairball, and it says, "Sometimes life's a hairball." I love it. Not that with four cats I need to hear it more, but it showed she really thought of me when she bought it.

Thanks so much for stopping in.

CC

Donna Marie Rogers said...

Hey Christie! Please, pick me, pick me!!! LOL

It's funny, but for years my husband has been the official card buyer. He does a good job, I really can't complain. He stands there and reads them, he picks just the right one (most of the time *g*), and it saves me from having to pick cards for the family. He also tells me he loves me every day, he's good about that. Better than me, actually. LOL

Anna Kathryn Lanier said...

Hi, Christie. My husband doesn't buy cards either. And he doesn't always open the ones I give him...so, I'd say he's a little unromantic. He opens birthday cards, but little "Happy Halloween, let's get naked" cards, he leaves on his shelf.

I have to say though, he is good a buying gifts for me. I always get nice ones: computer, video camera, digital camera, etc.

As for the most recent romantic thing....mmmm, I don't know. I really can't recall...maybe it's just too early in the morning.

Congrats on the newest about to be released book! Happy sales.

Sandy said...

My man used to buy me cards in the beginning when we first married, but not now. Grin.

He recently bought me a 37 inch TV because he has a 61 inch TV, and he didn't it was fair that I watch my programs on a 19 inch box, and he had a big screen. I thought it was a waste of money, but I really love it now. Hadn't realized my eyes were getting old. lol

He works on my computer all the time, and recently decided I needed a new one. He's helping me to learn how to use the new one. Smile. He's at my beck and call when I have a problem with it and don't know what to do. That might be because he doesn't want me to screw anything up. lol

Great blog, Christie.

I want that book. Really bad. I need a laugh.

conley730 said...

Most men I know don't shop for cards. They just go and pick one and hope they get lucky! I love that your husband gave over a $5 bill rather than shop for a card. That really is priceless!

Christie Craig said...

Donna,

You have a man who'll buy cards. Wow!! Hold on to him!!!

Hubby isn't shy about saying the words, I don't know why he dreads shopping for the right words.

Oddly enough, he actually likes reading poetic prose. When he reads a book that has a good line, he always reads it to me. There's just something about cards that does him in.

Thanks for stopping in.

CC

Christie Craig said...

Anna,

I have actually had to make my hubby open a card. And duh, it had a $20 bill. Hey, while you hubby may not be romantic, those gifts sound pretty neat. LOL.

Thanks so much for stopping by. By the way, I love all the recipes on your site.


CC

Christie Craig said...

Sandy,

37 inch isn't close to the 61 inch, (LOL) but when you mentioned the computer help, I knew he was a winner. I'm always going to hubby to fix something. And when he does it without moaning I know he love me loads.

Thank you so much for popping in.

CC

Christie Craig said...

Conley730,

Yeah, he thought he was pretty cute, too. And the kicker was when my son-in-law agreed with him. But hey, you gotta love those men.

Thanks so much for stopping in.

CC

CrystalGB said...

My husband will buy a card occasionally but he doesn't love doing it.
He likes to surprise me with flowers just to say I love you and leave love notes in my purse.
I tell him I love him every day and make his favorite desserts and buy him something for his hobbies.

Susan Helene Gottfried said...

I'd rather have chocolate than a card, even if the card lasts longer.

No need to enter me, Christie. Just my usual thanks for the e-mail. I've go this up at Win a Book for you.

Lizeastern said...

I love to take baths & while doing so I like to eat a few pieces of candy- chocolate, sweedish fish etc. Every once in a while my hubby will bring home a new candy he saw & thought I might like for bath time. Although he doesn't understand why I do italways starts the bath, lights the candles, gets the wine & new candy all set up. Once he even brought home the cutiest painted candy dish to put my candy in. No Hallmark cards but surprise candy... I think I'll keep him

Christie Craig said...

CrystalGB,

Flowers are nice. Hubby will buy flowers, no problem, too. Your hubby sounds a like keeper, too. Keep making him those desserts.

Thanks so much for stopping in.

CC

Christie Craig said...

Susan,

Thanks so much for stopping in. I love your site, win a book and thanks for posting it.

And hey, chocolate is great. The problem is when he gives it me, he eats it. LOL.

CC

Christie Craig said...

Lizeastern,

Hey, he sounds like a charm. Treat him right and love him back.

Thanks so much for stopping by.

CC

TerriOsburn said...

I'm thinking very hard and I can't remember ever getting a card from my ex-H. Or any of the ex-BF's after. Do you write these purposely to depress me?

Picking my name for that ARC sure would make me feel better.

MsHellion said...

No, no one buys me cards but other women. Women know the importance of cards. Men do not.

I think if the cards had little tab marks like "This card will get you laid in 10 days" and "This card will get you laid immediately" and "This card will restore your rights to getting laid, you dumbass"--they might go with it. Then they wouldn't have to read the card, just the tabs.

I think my brain would have stopped at "Seldom" too. *LOL* You've probably got a lot of lotion bottles in the bathroom or something. Clutter in the bathroom seems to drive them batshitcrazy for some reason.

Wendy Roberts said...

Cards. Well. I'm the wrong one to ask because I had sloppy, romantic cards that have five paragraphs of gush LOL. Show me you mean it. Don't give me someone else's words on cardboard LOL!

Sabine G. said...

They do, they do. Mine went to the hallmark store all the time. I had a shoebox full of sweet, loving, and sometimes funny cards. It was all a set up for the day he would walk out. I admire mean who can show their love without loosing an ounce of macho.
As far as divorced (3 times) desperate (very) and deceived (just once and it was the hardest thing I ever went through).
So I would love to read you book, I would. I would, I really would. :)

Diana said...

My husband will carefully read every card in a section so long as he doesn't have to buy a sympathy card. For some reason, shopping for condolence cards freaks him out. So when someone dies, I am sent out to get those cards.

What's amusing is that my husband is much more likely to buy a really mushy card than I am. For our last anniversary, he gave me a card with lots of fluffy, poetic words about how much he loved me, etc., etc., etc. I gave him a card with a cartoon of two people in a bed, the sheets nailed down in place so the wife couldn't hog them all.

chey said...

Hi,
I usually get a lottery ticket instead of a card.

Pam said...

My hubby is more romantic than me in some ways. I would always choose the funny cards but he will choose the soppiest one in the store. But then he does things like buy me an egg cooker for my birthday.

melacan at hotmail dot com

Virginia said...

My husband does not shop for cards or anything for me. It more all for him. Like want are you going to get for me? What are you going to fix me to eat? I know this is sad but it is what it is.

I would love to have your new book it sounds like it going to be a good pick me up!

Kristi said...

My husband does actually shop for cards. He managed to give me the same anniversary card 2 years in a row. Now I tease him that he bought a case of the same cards so he always has them on hand.

laram81 said...

My husband doesn't have a problem buying cards.. but he usually picks the cheap ones.. which is OK. At least he buys one. I'm actually the one who hates buying greeting cards.. I prefer to make them myself. If I get a card, I usually throw them away - of course I think everyone is like me so I don't want to waste the money.. I just print something out on the computer. Cute and inexpensive.

Ya know, I feel like I complain to/about my husband too much, I think I'll just call him up right now and tell him that I love & appreciate him.

Can't wait for the new book!!
-Lara Murray

Beth Watson said...

I bought my hubby a funny card for our first anniversary and he actually got upset that it wasn't sentimental and mushy like the one that he bought me. But I don't think my hubby is the normal guy when it comes to card buying. :-)

Whenever my hubby has upset me over the past few months I just remember the bunny story. I was out of town for work and he called me that he'd found a baby bunny in the garage. It was lethargic. It had apparently been trapped in there for days, afraid to bolt whenever it heard the garage door open. So my hubby took it to an animal rescue shelter and made a donation, hoping they could bring him back to health. When he told me this I literally cried on the phone. He knows I love bunnies--I feed them in the winter whenever we have really cold spells or severe snow falls. This was so incredibly sweet and whenever I get upset with him now I just think "Remember the bunny..."

catslady said...

My husband is very inconsistent - I get cards most of the time but he has been known to grab the card he gave me last year (if I like it, it's up on my bulletin board), he has sent me the same card (not realizing it of course) two or three times and sometimes right in a row although the last one I received was absolutely perfect and I know he actually put some time looking for it :)

Christie Craig said...

Hi Terri,

Chin up girl. You got rid of those guys for a reason!!

You name's in the hat.

Thanks so much for stopping in.

CC

Christie Craig said...

MsHellion,

I think you just hit the nail on the head!!! If cards came with "getting laid" guarantees men would be experts at buying them. LOL.

Too funny girl. And yes, my bathroom counter is cluttered, poor guy gave up and started using the towel closet for his stuff. My bad!!

CC

Christie Craig said...

Wendy,

I'll admit the cards that really touch me are those that he writes something sweet in himself. And showing your love is always better than a card.

CC

Christie Craig said...

Hi Sabine,

Yup, I love macho men who can still show their love. And I still love your cover girl.

Thanks so much for stopping by.

CC

Christie Craig said...

Diana,

Okay, I'm probably a funny card buyer more than I am a serious one. And I don't blame your hubby for not liking to pick out sympathy cards. That's always hard.

But your hubby sounds like a good one.

Thanks for stopping in.

CC

Christie Craig said...

Chey,

That's too funny. Now, if you win, are you expected to share the winnings?

Thanks for stopping in.

CC

Christie Craig said...

Pam,

An egg cooker? Seriously? Oh, my, that would make the funniest blog!!!

Thanks for sharing.

CC

Christie Craig said...

Virginia,

You need to do what my mama used to call, shake the suger tree!! I think we all fall prey to taking those closest to us for granted.

Thanks so much for stopping in.

CC

Christie Craig said...

Kristi,

In his defense, it's easy to do. When I shop for my mother a card, I find myself thinking. .. "This card is perfect, but didn't I sent it to her last year?"

My mom and I usually send funny cards.

Thanks so much for visiting.

CC

Christie Craig said...

Lara,

If I had a good eye for making cards, I can see how that would be more sentimental than buying one. It takes me forever to get something to look right.

My favorite cards are those my kids made me as child.

Thanks so much for stopping by.

CC

Christie Craig said...

Ahh Beth,

I love the bunny story. What a hero!!! Any man who has the heart to love animals has a good heart.

Thanks so much for sharing.

CC

Christie Craig said...

Catslady,

They are funny creatures. But hey, if the care was perfect the first time because it said exactly what he felt, it's still perfect. You gotta love 'em.

Thanks for stopping in.

CC

Herzleid said...

Never had a guy that was much for romance... I think my most romantic experience was with my main squeeze in college. One late late night around my birthday he not only walked across half the city to sleep at my place rather than his own after a party, but on his way there also stole me a bus stop sign.

Explanation required, I hear you. My last name happens to be identical with the name of a well-known location, and thus a bus stop, in my city. The sign was for the night route, so it has a cute little crescent moon next to my name – all in the blue and white color scheme of the local bus company.

He would never have bought me a Hallmark card. Stealing a public sign was much more his style. =D

Christie Craig said...

Herzleid,

Okay, I have to give it to you, that's romantic in a bad boy kind of way.

Thanks so much for sharing.

CC

Kate said...

Do guys actually read cards? I thought they just randomly picked one up and hoped it was right! :)

Lois said...

Ooh, pick me, pretty please! :) (hmm, that doesn't look like enough groveling. . .)

Anyway, ah, well, I'm 32, a couple months shy of 33, and well, I never had a guy. So I couldn't tell you whether he was a Hallmark card guy or not. . . so, imagining one right now, yep, he sure is. Always remembers the holidays, my birthday, the day we met. . . always gets flowers and candy for Valentine's Day. . . always takes out the garbage, never hogs the remote, never steals the covers, and even wants to read romance novels with me, and not just for the sex scenes! :)

Lois. . . okay, me on fantasy island right now. . . ;)

Christie Craig said...

Kate,

Very good point!!

Thanks for dropping in.

CC

Christie Craig said...

Lois,

Scoot over, I'm coming to the island with you!!! LOL.

Thanks for visiting.

CC

Liz Kreger said...

A very funny blog, Christie. I enjoyed it. My hubby is not the sentimental sort, but he's always there for me. I've been a cancer patient for 13 years and not once have I ever had any doubt that he was gonna stick by me. I'll take that over a Hallmark moment anyday.

And yes, he does shop for cards. Don't know how thorough he is in finding "just the right one" but he tends to hit some good ones.

Christie Craig said...

Hi Liz,

Your hubby sounds like a true hero.

Thanks so much for sharing. Get well wishes beinging sent cyberly.

CC

Jamie said...

My hubby used to be bad about it, he'd just grab the one with the fewest words on it and call it good. Now, he reads through them and makes a careful selection and picks out some fantastic cards (gifts too!), and both of my boys are also becoming very good at card and gift shopping. I'm very lucky that I have some great guys in my life.

Christie Craig said...

Jamie,

Train those boys!!! You are making great men.

Thanks for stopping in.

CC

Mary Ann Christian said...

I wasn't aware that Hallmark made cards for husbands to give to their wives. I AM aware, however, that there are many nifty gifts your honey can buy for that special occasion to show you how much he cares.

Just listen to some of the things I have received! A Dremel, for example. With attachments! Or how about the time that I got a new TV, all for my very own? It only came with one remote, and that was for him, but hey! The TV was mine! It fit in the living room entertainment center as if it had been made for it.
And then there was the time I received a beautiful Nintendo Wii gaming system! Oh BOY! I can bowl at least four frames before my Carpal Tunnel Syndrome kicks in and my fingers go completely numb. Then I just hand the controls to hubby and let him finish up. He has, over time, bought me an assortment of games to practice my wrestling, shooting, and driving skills, and I often spend countless time watching him demonstrate various techniques while trying to regain the feeling in my hands. The Wii works beautifully with my very own television. Ain't love grand! :)

Christie Craig said...

Mary Ann,

Too Funny.

Several years back my hubby gave me a cell phone. Guess who took it with him everywhere?

Love it. But hey. . . what can we do. We gotta love 'em.

Thanks so much for the laugh.

CC

Brandy said...

I'm a bit odd that I don't really like cards. They can be expensive and I can always write a letter or poem to show him how much I care. As a matter of fact, he's kept all those letters. *G* I usually keep the wonderful cards he buys me (and he does actually shop for them) for 2 or 3 weeks and then I throw them away.
My hubs shows me he morning when he scoops the cat litter (he has mornings I have nights), when he pushes me to get my shower first because I have a headache, but most of all? When he makes phone calls for me and shops for those feminine items at the grocery store for me. *G*
We say I love you all the time. It's harder to see all the little things sometimes and easy to say the words.

As for the contest? I would be most delighted to win, but if I don't-your book is already in my TBB list, anyway *G*

Christie Craig said...

Brandy,

LOL. Thanks so much for sharing. And you're right, scooping poop says I love you like nothing else.

Thanks for dropping in.

CC

Chelsea B. said...

No husband. But what I find really funny is that the other day I was in wal-mart and turned down the card isle, and do you know what? Not one woman, but FIVE MEN! Yes, I counted. And yes, I laughed. Because they were tall and huge and holding pink cards with pretty glitter. Well, one of them was, anyway. I wanted to take a picture, I really did :)

Refhater said...

It's 12:02 and I just got home. (Volunteered for the Rotary Auction.) Is it to late to enter?

My dad and one out of 2 brothers will shop and buy the perfect card for each occasion. The other brother is content to let his wife pick out cards for him.

Stacey Joy Netzel said...

I like a good card, but can't stand it when I turn it over and it says $3.99 USD. Good God! And I can't help looking, because I also just toss most of them. Now days, I go to the Dollar store and pick up 2 for $1. My hubby does shop for cards because after a couple years of not getting anything for birthday or anniversary, I warned him that at the VERY LEAST he could get me a card.

He went a little far when I was out of town for Mother's Day (kids were very young and with me) and I come home to a card and carnations (told him not to to waste $ on roses either--carnations are just as pretty and cheaper!) only to find out he drove to the store sick with the flu, actually threw up in the car on the way there, but figured he'd better get that darn card! Either that's love, or he's just scared of me.

He knows now: throwing up = a pardon on the card.

Christie Craig said...

Chelsea B.,

Too funny. I swear around Valentine's day I'm going to the card store and just spy. I think that would be so funny.

Thanks for sharing.


CC

Christie Craig said...

Refhater,

So what your saying is that the art of shopping for cards isn't hereditary? Hmm?

Thanks so much for popping in.

CC

Christie Craig said...

Stacey,

Okay...thanks for the laugh! Throwing up=a pardon. Love it.

Thanks for popping in.

CC

TerriOsburn said...

I could be losing it, but I looked all over the website for a newsletter link and couldn't find one. What am I missing? LOL!

dyockman said...

A Hallmark Card? Sure if it was funny or one of those singing cards. As for the rest, yesterday I came home to find my mail with a flower resting on it in my seat. He does stuff like that every so often. *sigh* how can you not love him?