Wednesday, September 30, 2009

TIWITO (Things I Wish I'd Thought Of)


The Internet - Wish I'd thought of that. What's more fun than spending an entire day looking for naked pictures of Johnny Depp online (when you're supposed to be writing your book)? FINDING naked pictures of Johnny Depp online. BTW - if you find any, please let me know.



Threatening Your Customers - Wish I'd thought of that. Why, my troop's girl scout cookie sales would triple if I just showed up to sell them holding oily rags and accelerant and wiggling my eyebrows. Sopranos be damned. Nothing is creepier than dangerous little girls. Look at The Ring, the twins in The Shining, The Bad Seed...I'm right and you know it. Maybe I could get permission to print this on t-shirts...



Zombies - I wish I'd thought of that. They're enjoying a resurge lately, what with Jane Austen incorporating them into her books, YA zombie fic, and the new movie Zombieland. I wish I'd known the potential sexiness of decaying flesh with limbs falling off randomly. Leprosy is still out but zombie romance is here to stay.


What is it you wish YOU had thought of???

The Assassin

12 comments:

Phyllis Bourne said...

Love the Girl Scout poster. But they don't have to threaten me, I practically tackle 'em to get my 10 boxes of thin mints.

Leslie Langtry said...

That's true! I'd kill someone right now for one sleeve of thin mints...

Suzan Harden said...

Oooo! Thin Mints! So much better than brains!

Go see Zombieland! It's absolutely hysterical!

I wish I'd invented Webkinz or Chaotic. And if you don't know what they are, ask a preteen.

Leslie Langtry said...

Webkinz I know, but Chaotic? I wish I'd added Wizard 101 to the list too...

TerriOsburn said...

The straw. Which leads to the question, which came first, the straw or the blow dart? Someone google that.

Re: Zombies. Michael Jackson made them sexy 25 years ago. Who knew it would take this long to catch on?

I managed not only not to buy GS cookies this year, I was never even approached to buy them. How does that happen? It's not like I live on a deserted island or something.

Leslie Langtry said...

Well, you'll be getting a text from me in January, Terri...

TerriOsburn said...

Mail order cookies. I can do that.

Becky LeJeune said...

Oh I wish I'd thought of tons of things, Harry Potter and Twilight among them : )

Leslie Langtry said...

Good point. I wish I'd invented Daniel Craig.

Refhater said...

I wished I'd thought of Magic 8 balls, pez dispensers, and margaritas.

Leslie Langtry said...

Can you trademark a cocktail? Do you get royalties on that?

Brandy said...

I never see Girl Scouts in my neighborhood and wish I did! *G*
I wish I'd invented Cherry Diet Dr. Pepper. I'm now addicted to it and I just know the company is messing with me and this is going to be a limited thing. Better start stockpiling now....... *G*