Tuesday, December 02, 2008

To See, Or Not To See...


Margaret just got her first pair of glasses. She's in fifth grade and as soon as she got them, she proclaimed, "OMG! (she actually talks like that) I CAN SEE!"

The other day, Mr. Assassin found my first pair of glasses. That's them above. I got mine in fourth grade. I showed them to my daughter and she pretended to vomit. Nice.

I was in fourth grade when I got these stylish babies. And while we have age in common, there isn't much else about the experience that was similar. Oh sure, my "Granny" glasses were the peak of fashion in 1975. But I didn't look nearly as cool in mine as Margaret does in hers.

Let's take a little trip back in time as I explain getting my first pair of glasses to my daughter;

Me: Alright, quit with the gagging noise. I get it.

Margaret: YOU thought THESE were cool??? What was wrong with you?

Me: Um...Grandma picked them out (trying to lie convincingly in order to save face in front of a ten-year old).

Margaret: Not buying it. Grandma's cooler than you.

Me: Anyway, I remember we drove 20 miles into the city to get tested for my prescription and pick out my frames. I believe the exam took about...oh, three hours.

Margaret: Mine was only fifteen minutes.

Me: (Ignoring her) And they brought me the entire selection to pick from. There were five different styles.

Margaret: You mean 500, at least, right?

Me: Actually, my memory might be exaggerating...

Margaret: I knew it!

Me: There were only three frames to choose from. And believe me, these were the best ones.

Margaret: (Holding them between the tips of her thumb and forefinger as if she might catch leprosy) Why are they so heavy?

Me: Because that's 100%, non-scratchproof, non-shatter resistant glass, baby. And they didn't have thin lenses then. That's real steel in the frames.

Margaret: Mine have featherweight, scratchproof lenses and were ready in an hour.

Me: That's the other thing. These took three weeks to make. And then they cost about $800.

Margaret: (Rolling her eyes) Oh yeah. You had it sooooo good back then. Face it, Mom. My glasses are awesome and yours are gross.

Me: Hey! Look! (I try to shout as she walks away) These frames were made in France! Yours were made in China! Ha!

Somehow the conversation seemed like a hollow victory. And I didn't even get the chance to point out the really cool "L" sticker in the corner - now glued on by the passing of time. How in the hell did we see with all those damned initial stickers on the lenses anyway?

I guess in the long run, what I remember most from getting my first pair of glasses was that my boyfriend, Derek...Something, broke up with me because I was a "four-eyes." Margaret's boyfriend didn't even bat an eyelash - even asked his parents when he could get glasses. At least there's some small consolation in that.

The Assassin

17 comments:

Refhater said...

I remember getting my first pair of glasses after my 3rd car accident. (Apparently they really help with depth perception those other cars were alot closer than they looked.) I remember being amazed that trees had individual leaves instead of one big green clump at the top.

I've since had the Lasik surgery and loved every minute of it. It cost a pretty penny but was totally worth it.

Lucy said...

I had those exact same glasses and, in doing the math I figure we had them at the same time. I'm a little jealous that you had three options to choose from. You must have grown up in a big town. ;)

Keri Ford said...

Refhater, I noticed that about the leaves too!

I got mine in 9th grade. I couldn't see those darn overhead projectors the teachers insisted on using. The frames are Candies (same as the shoe company) and are a dark olive green. They've always fit my face really well.

I'm still using the same glasses. Doc says my eyes have worsened, but as long as I can still see leaves, then I'm keeping my glasses just as they are!

Kim said...

Poor Leslie. I really think Margaret won that battle. LOL.

By the time I got my first glasses I got pretty blue frames with a light blue tint. They were so pretty! They did take forever to get here though.

Wendy Roberts said...

Oh my glasses were sooo cool they stayed mostly in my locker all through highschool LOL. Never did get used to glasses. Wore contacts most of my adult life and finally had the surgery earlier this year.

Margaret has a boyfriend? he he

Leslie Langtry said...

Oh my god. I had the leaves on the tree thingy too!!! My mom told me my first words after putting on my glasses were, "There are leaves? On trees???" Mr. Assassin said the exact same thing, according to his mom. Maybe that would be a good marketing campaign...So Good You Can See The Leaves On Trees!

Keri Ford said...

When I noticed the leaves, I was surrounded by non-glass wearing, good eye-sight friends.

They all just looked at me and said, "Yeah." in that teenage tone. The didn't get the profoudness.

Christie Craig said...

I think it's cool that she likes her glasses.

And I'll bet you were pretty cute back in the day.

CC

Gemma Halliday said...

I got my first pair of glasses last year. Just for the computer. But I got them in hot pink. :) Can't say they help me see any clearer, but they do stop my eyes from twitching when I write all day, so I love em.

Anonymous said...

I got my first pair of glasses as a young teenager because I had headaches and lazy eye.

Karen T.

Leslie Langtry said...

I wanted to comment on what Lucy said - I grew up in a town of about 5,000 but near a city of 300,000. The selection is better now. I actually have about 4 pair - 2 that I wear regularly. I have to wear them all the time - having given up contacts a year ago. I'm curious about the surgery and those of you who had it. You really love it, eh?

Oh, and Gemma, I think we need you to post a photo of you in your hot pink glasses!

terrio said...

I got my first pair in 3rd grade and I too had the little stickers. I think I had a strawberry for Strawberry Shortcake. I also had my initial at some point.

I didn't have the leaves thing that I remember but I can remember going to a HS football game and assuming everything on the field was supposed to be blurry because it was so far away. When I got the glasses (and after my eyes adjusted and the floor stopped rolling up in front of me) I was so excited that everything was clear.

I wear contacts now and have since age 17. I want that surgery in the worst way. But I need to win the lottery first. Or get a really good raise.

Lucy said...

I had the lasik surgery in 2001 and am so glad I did. No regrets - worth every penny.

Estella said...

I got my first glasses in 9th grade, which was 1956. Heavy, 2 choices of frames, both metal.

Leslie Langtry said...

Estella, you got me beat! Wait until I tell Margaret! She won't believe you either.

Refhater said...

Having the Lasik surgery was one of the best things I've ever done. It took 45 minutes to do both eyes and I was back to work the next day. It's totally worth the cost. The only negative I had was getting used to peripheral vision. I never had it while wearing glasses and after the surgery it made me nauseous until I got used to things moving out of the corner of my eye.

You just have to be careful to get a good doctor to do it for you. And some docs will even let you set up a payment plan.

Sue A. said...

I got mine in 3rd grade. And they were gold metal frames. I tried contacts as a young adult, but I couldn't handle the discomfort.