Friday, May 30, 2008

Duck and cover

This week I went on date #2 with The Firefighter. Fabulous. I would swear he got even hotter. And the requisite getting-to-know-you stuff is actually kind of fun with him, instead of the tedious chore it’s been with other guys. I learned he likes to listen to Sinatra (I love oldies!), just bought a new freezer for his martini bar (He has a martini bar in his house. Be still my beating heart.) and – this was the clincher – loves to shop at DSW (a.k.a. my shoe mecca). Yeah, you heard me right. A hot fireman that likes to browse shoe stores. Oh. My. God. Seriously he’s so cool, I’m waiting for the secret child or deranged ex-wife to pop out of his past any second.

So, to celebrate great date #2 (a rarely see but often fantasized about phenomenon) Mom and I decided to go to the mall. Ever since Mom put up her snakier than snark online dating profile, she’s been my idol. So after a good twenty minutes of me gushing in a giddy post-date haze, I asked how her dating life is faring.

“Ahn.” She shrugs.
“Hmm. Just ahn?”
“Well, okay, there is this one guy…”
So, I drag out of her that she’s met a retired former Navy captain. The first date went okay and he’s asked her out on a second for this weekend. “But,” she says, “he wants to go hiking.”
K, normally hiking might be fun. But when a gal meets a guy online, it’s probably best not to go out in the wilderness alone with him until you really know each other. I mean, even the Bicycle Thief and the Fighter with the body in the closet faked normal for the first three dates before showing their true colors.
So, I agree with Mom, hiking is not such a hot idea.
As we make our way through Macy’s, I offer up some alternatives. A stroll through the park? (Kind of like hike-light.) A walk through downtown? (Like hiking, but with window shopping.) Dinner and a movie? (Okay, nothing like hiking, but I know she hasn’t seen Indiana Jones yet.)
We’re walking through men’s wear, and I’m running out of ideas, when mom stops mid-step, abruptly veers right, and power walks the opposite direction.
I jog after her, catching up just as she shoves me around the corner into housewares.
“What was that about?” I asked.
Mom points over my shoulder. “That was him!”
I turn around. “Who?”
“The captain. The hiker wanna-be. He’s here!”
No. Way. What are the chances? So, I peak around the corner just in time to see a tall, blond guy paying for a pair of gray slacks. He’s slim, thick head of hair, strong jaw. Not bad, really. So, I say, “Let’s go say hi.”
Mom shakes her head. “Now way. Can’t.”
“Why not?”
“I’m wearing the same outfit I wore on the date!”
I look down. She’s in flat-front jeans, black shirt, white cropped jacket. Pretty cute date outfit, actually.
“If he sees me in this again, he’ll think I don’t have any other clothes!”
I do a giggle/snort thing. But, I have to agree, in her situation, I’d totally duck, too. No one wants to be a fashion one-hit wonder.
So, we hide out in housewares (picking up a new set of margarita glasses and a nacho bowl) while waiting for him to finish shopping. Finally the coast looks clear, and we emerge, making our through the mall.
Only, we make it just three stores in before Mom grabs my arm and veers left again.
I look up.
And the blond guy is dead ahead, coming right toward us. Man, he gets around!
Mom propels me into Anne Taylor, shoving me behind a rack of a-line skirts.
“Oh no. Oh crap. Do you think he saw me?” she pants.
I peak out. He’s making a beeline for the exit, no sign of recognition on his face.
“Doesn’t look like it.”
She does a sigh of relief. “Oh thank God.” Then her expression relaxes and she lets out a little laugh. “You know, maybe I will go on that second date. We’re obviously a lot more alike than I thought.”
“Because he shops Macy’s, too?” Hey, I gotta admit, a Navy captain who does Macy’s is almost as cool as a shoe-shopping firefighter. (Almost.)
But, Mom shakes her head, the laughter growing now. “No. Because he was dressed in the same outfit, too!”
Mental forehead smack.

Okay, so, fess up. Anyone else ever done the duck and hide thing from a guy? What’s the most silly, ridiculous, down-right embarrassing thing you’ve ever done when running into an unexpected acquaintance?

~Trigger Happy Halliday


Lucy said...

Oh too funny. Thanks for the laugh.

Keri Ford said...

How cute is this story? I'm glad you're both finding someone who are so far are normal!

I would say hiking is definately out but it sounds like ya'll have come with some great ideas. I vote for dinner and a movie because I haven't seen Indiana Jones either!

Anonymous said...

I just did the giggle/snort thing too. Great story!

Wendy Roberts said...

Must be the mystery writer in me but I immediately wondered if the guy was stalking her LOL

Kathy Bacus said...

The firefighter sounds very promising, Gemma. And what a hoot with the one-hit-outfit wonder story. Actually, this has happened to me, too. I think we all have outfits that make us feel really good when we put them on. Unfortunately, that's normally when you happen on to the same people you saw when you last wore that same apparel.


Can't wait to hear about the next dates--both yours and your mum's!

~Bullet Hole~

Unknown said...

that is really funny!
Good luck with the fireman. from my own personal expenince I love mine!!They are generally great guys.

Christie Craig said...

Gemma, Gemma, Gemma,

Now I love it that we're also hearing your mom's dating stories.

The firemen still sounds yummy.

Hmmm...ducking and hiding? Not from a boyfriend, but once I really wanted to duck and hide from my agent because I wasn't wearing any makeup and was wearing my pajamas in the stairway in a hotel.

Of course, I felt better when I saw she was wearing hers too.

Fire alarms will do that to you.

Crime Scene Christie

Keri Ford said... glad I was not on that floor and running around a conference hotel in my pj's! It was more than once, wasn't it?

Anonymous said...

ROFL!!! I love your mom!!!

And yoru firefighter sounds truly dishy!

Anonymous said...


Sheesh. Make that "your". *rolling eyes*

Terri Osburn said...

I almost forgot to check out the date update. Whew, that was close.

This is so adorable. I really love your mom. And I'm grudgingly happy you found your firefighter. DSW is shoe heaven, hands down. LOVE that store.

I saw some dude I went out with a couple times last summer at my grocery store. I say *my* since it is less than a mile from my house. But it's out of the way from his house.

I managed to pretend I didn't see him, I don't think he noticed me, and all was well. But I couldn't help but be irritated the dude had broken that grocery store territory rule.

Jenyfer Matthews said...

That is such a funny story! Hope both your second dates go as well as the first!

Eden Bradley-Eve Berlin said...

OMG-sooooo funny! I can't believe your Mom's dating life is as entertaining as yours!
OTOH, I guess you had to get your genes from somewhere...*G*

Gemma Halliday said...

Gah – been with out internet all weekend and couldn't get to the blog! Starting to go through withdrawals!

Yep, Mom has awesome date stories. She cracks me up. I’ll keep you posted on her captain!