Well, most of you know last Sunday was Father’s day. And what does that have to do with plumbers? Well, my dear old dad is a plumber. Yup, he calls it “shit work.” Ahh, but that man is good at snaking a drain and he wields a mean pipe wrench. His hard work put a roof over our heads and food in our mouths. He’s proud of his profession and he should be.
Nevertheless, when I went to write Divorced, Desperate and Deceived, even though I had originally included a plumber in the first book of the series who was mildly interested in Kathy,(okay he was plumb crazy over her) I was having some serious second thoughts.
I mean, my books are suspenseful and how suspenseful is a plumber’s job? Could I build suspense over what was stopping up the toilet? Can you see a leaky faucet being a big chapter hook that would keep you turning pages? In the beginning, I tried to come up with different scenarios. Maybe he finds a murder weapon in the drain? (Will a gun flush? I was gonna try it with a water gun, but then I couldn’t figure out how I would explain it to my hubby if it did flush and stopped up the john.) What if there’s a finger found in the garbage disposal? (That plumb disturbed me. Hubby’s gonna have to clean that drain out if it ever starts sounding funny, because my hands are not going in there again.) Maybe I should make this book a bit of a paranormal and he discovers a demon in the septic tank. (As bonkers as all those ideas sound, this is really the way my plotting goes in the beginning.) I tried, and tried, but my brain was clogged, so I basically flushed the plumber and was in search of a different hero with a more appropriate profession.
Why? Now don’t go accusing me of being a white-collar snob. But, let’s face it. Plumbers just don’t have great reputations or an exciting lifestyle. People assume If a plumber isn’t cheating you out of money by claiming some pipe needs to be replaced, resealed, or reblown, then they are bent over and giving you a peek at their famous, if not clichéd, plumber’s crack.
Now remember, I am the daughter of a plumber. And in defense of that profession, I want you to know that my daddy is an honest man and wouldn’t cheat a soul. Now about the other accusation . . . Yeah, the crack. Well, let’s just say I plead the fifth. But seriously, I don’t think it has anything to do with his profession, the poor man just doesn’t have any hips. But that doesn’t make him any less of a hero. Why if you ask some women they’ll even tell you that he’s quite the lady’s man.
However, since everyone I told that I was considering bringing in a new hero had conniption fits, I had to go back and flush out an idea that would work. And I’m here to announce that I’ve done a good thing. In defense of plumbers everywhere, we now have one hot, very seductive snake-draining hero, with a killer smile. And with hips, of course. (Sorry dad!) The fact that he wields a pistol even better than he does a pipe wrench, makes him a little more interesting than your average Joe.
Ahh, it was a fun book to write and while it doesn’t come out until late November, I got my cover and I decided to share it along with my back cover blurb.
“Christie Craig will crack you up!”
—New York Times Bestselling Author Kerrelyn Sparks
Of the Divorced, Desperate and Delicious club, Kathy Callahan is the last surviving member. Oh, her two friends haven’t died or anything. They just gave up their vows of chastity. They went for hot sex with hot cops and happy second marriages—something Kathy can never consider, given her past. Yet there’s always her plumber, Stan Bradley. He seems honest, hardworking...and pretty handy with a tool.
Kathy’s best-laid plans are about to hit a clog. The guy snaking her drain is handier with a pistol than a pipe wrench, and she’s about to see more action than Arnold Schwarzenegger. The next few days promise pursuit, passion and some very unhappy hit men. And at the end of this wild escapade, Kathy and her own undercover lawman will be flush with happiness . . . assuming they both survive.
Okay…so there you have it, my next release. And since we’re talking professions, let me ask you guys: What professions do you like the heroes and heroines to have in a book? What’s the craziest job you’ve ever done? What’s your dream job? What job would you never ever do? What’s the craziest job any of your friends have? Come on, share a bit.
~Crime Scene Christie