Friday, April 10, 2009

Hoppy Easter!!!

Only two more days until the bunny comes hopping down the trail, leaving colored eggs and chocolates in his/her wake. Requests from the young(ish) ones in my house for bunny offerings? My son (8yr old) is hoping for candy. Chocolate. Preferably in the shape of a bunny. And life sized. My brother (20 yr old) said he’d like a basket filled with fake grass, jelly beans, and beer. My kind of basket.

One Easter tradition that we have in our house is that the bunny always brings at least one Easter book in my son’s basket. The boy’s favorite so far has been The Golden Egg by A.J. Wood. It’s a really cute rhyming pop-up book with lots of gold, silver, and sparkly foil inside so it kinda shimmers like real golden eggs.

My fav Easter story – or really anytime story – is by far Country Bunny and the Little Gold Shoes by Dubose Heyward. This book is about how one little girl bunny, who always wanted to be an Easter bunny, was told by the big men bunnies she was just a girl, she could never make it. So, she grew up, had a bunch of kids, and being “only a mom” thought she’d never get her chance to fulfill her dream of being an Easter bunny. That is until her amazing skills honed by motherhood proved to be far superior to those of the big men bunnies. ;) (Girl-bunny power!)

This year, a little bunny told me the boy is getting The Tale of Despereaux (Okay, it's about a mouse, not a bunny, but his ears are very big for a mouse.) and The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane (This one is a bunny!) both by Kate DiCamillo.

As Kathy mentioned yesterday, I know that for many people, the bunny years have passed, and this holiday's focus is largely a religious one. (By the way – my son is confused to no end about what a bunny and dyed eggs have to do with Jesus. Being a history buff, I tried to explain, but I think I lost him somewhere around the Pagan rites of spring.) So, for those of you who will be donning your finest dresses, wide brimmed hats, and fancy shoes for an Easter morning visit to church, here is a fun list I found in one of my research tangents on the web yesterday. They are lines from actual church bulletins published in 2008 around the country. Suddenly, I’m feeling like my typos aren’t all that bad… (P.S. Do NOT drink coffee while reading this!)

- The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.

- The sermon this morning: 'Jesus Walks on Water.' The sermon tonight: 'Searching for Jesus.'

- Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 PM in the recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.

- Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.

- The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.

- Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say 'Hell' to someone who doesn't care much about you.

- Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.

- Miss Charlene Mason sang 'I will not pass this way again,' giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.

- For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

- Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.

- The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir will sing: 'Break Forth Into Joy.'

- Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.

- A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.

- At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be 'What Is Hell?' Come early and listen to our choir practice.

- Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.

- Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

- Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.

- The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility.

- Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow.

- The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.

- This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.

- Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B. S. is done.

- The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.

- Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.

- The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

- Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.

- The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan: Last Sunday: ''I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours'

Hoppy Easter, all!!!!!

~Trigger (and bunny) Happy Halliday


housemouse88 said...

I needed a laugh this morning. I definitely got one. Thanks. I made sure I wasn't drinking coffee.

Have a great day.

Gillian Layne said...

The love The Country Bunny!!

Thanks for the grins this morning. :)

Tori Lennox said...

I love unintentionally funny church bulletins! These are a riot!!!

Blinky St. James said...

Lol! These are funny. :D

I passed an award on to Killer Fiction:


Christie Craig said...

Oh my! Too funny!!

Thanks for the laugh.


Estella said...

Thanks for the laughs!

♥ Dawn said...

LOL! This list is hysterical. I think I'll put on my electric girdle and engage in some gracious hostility. LOL! But all joking aside, Happy Easter! And thank you all for sacrificing your time and bringing joy into our lives.

Gemma Halliday said...

Blinky, that's awesome! Thanks!!!


Gemma Halliday said...

Glad you guys enjoyed these. :) Have a great weekend, everyone!


Bookmobiler said...

Sometimes things are a little more public.

Check out these church signs.

Anonymous said...

Great post, Gemma. I laughed till I cried. LOL.


catslady said...

Oh I just love Country Bunny - I miss reading that story to my girls but when those grandbabies start coming...Happy Easter.

Gemma Halliday said...

Bookmobiler - Those are hilarious! Lol!


M. said...

I've seen these before but they still make me laugh to the point of tears and pantsoid embarrassment every time. 'Come prepared to sin' indeed.