The Care and Feeding of Hypocrites

Hypocrites are one type of person I have a lot of trouble dealing with. I'm a shoot-straight kind of gal and I don't like dancing around and definitely not flat-out lying. I just don't see the point. Lord knows, I'm creative enough to lie, but then I'd have to put in all the additional effort to remember the lie and who I told it to and why I told it in the first place, and you get the idea. Then it becomes a full-time job. If everyone just said things straight out then a lot of people might not be happy but they'd darn sure be working with reality.

So yesterday I did Easter at my parents with my brother/sis-in-law and my niece, who is four. She goes to a mothers-day-out program at her church once or twice during the week and was showing me her folder of stuff from school. There was one page with stickers for things done well every day, and her mother informed me that they also get stickers for doing things wrong. So I asked if she had any of those. She said yes, and the tale unfolded:

The kids were all out on the playground and my niece picked up a piece of trash and threw it in the trashcan. A little boy went behind her and pulled the trash out of the can (and apparently there was no argument that this object was indeed trash). So my niece took it away from him (they're the same age) and threw it away again, telling him it was trash and to leave it in the can. He didn't. He reached back into the can and took the trash out again, so my niece shoved him down to the ground. Hence the naughty sticker.

So her mother says "that poor little boy and he was wearing glasses. That wasn't very nice. She even made him cry." She looks over at my niece and says. "But you apologized, didn't you?"

My niece looks up, and completely matter-of-fact says "I apologized, but I didn't mean it."

My mom and I instantly had coughing fits that required the use of napkins over lower half of face. I know you're not supposed to encourage unwanted behavior by laughing but c'mon. You have to admit it's funny. The girl knows that you're not supposed to play with trash and by darn she was going to get her point across. Not only that, she couldn't understand apologizing for something she wasn't sorry for doing. You gotta love kids.

And the irony of the whole thing made me wonder exactly what we are teaching them sometimes. I guess they can't run mannerless in society but well, I don't know. My niece can apparently find any angle to get her way and can also argue her points quite convincingly given her age. I figure if all else fails, she can be a politician.

So what do you think? Any funny stories of kids telling it like it is? Any theories on teaching hypocrisy? Are they too young to understand?

Deadly DeLeon