Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Now Is The Title Of Our Discontent...


I've had four different people ask me in the last two days how I come up with my titles. Granted, I can't tell if they are being complimentary or smart-assed, but I practice the religion known as Delusion - that way, it's always a compliment. Anyway, I thought I'd let you into my brilliant (or most likely deranged) mind and see the titles I submitted to my fabulous editor (she really is fabulous!) for the last manuscript. And yes, I really did send these to her. Buckle up friends - you're in for a bumpy ride;


PEOPLE ARE STRANGE, WHEN YOU'RE A STRANGLER (a little Doors thingy)


(a variation could be; PEOPLE ARE TARGETS, WHEN YOU'RE A HITMAN)


HERE ON KILL AGAIN ISLE (a nod to bad tv themes. I also came up with THAT'S THE WAY THEY BECAME THE BOMBAY BUNCH)


JUST LIKE THAT OLD TIME LOCK AND LOAD (it's Seeger-licious)


ONE KILL MAKES YOU SMALLER (a little Jeff. Airplane/Starship/whatever)


I'VE GOT KILLS - THEY'RE MULTIPLYING (did you know GREASE is the top box office movie musical ever?)


HOMOCIDE IS PAINLESS (ok, a little obscure since most people didn't know M*A*S*H's theme song actually had words)


I STILL HAVEN'T FOUND WHO I'M KILLING FOR (lovin' that Bono!)


PARADISE BY THE RIFLE SIGHTS (Meatloaf rocks!)


THE GUN WILL COME OUT, TOMORROW (a perversion of ANNIE - just because)


IT'S ANOTHER I'LL KILL YA SUNRISE (who doesn't love the EAGLES?)


SOMEONE TOOK THE HIT OUT IN THE RAIN (MacArthur's park...anyone? Anyone? Okay, I'm officially old.)


IF I COULD KNOCK YOU OFF IN PARADISE UP ABOVE (SHE BOOM SHE BOOM) (a little killer bebop)


I KILLED HIM MY WAY (It's Frank's world - we just live in it.)


So there you have it - you've looked into the mind of a demented writer and lived to tell about it. Please restore your seats and tables to their upright position and have a nice day, wherever your final destination may be...


By the way - I'm always looking for new titles! Give me one I can use and I'll send you a signed copy of my latest book - GUNS WILL KEEP US TOGETHER!


The Assassin

18 comments:

Christie Craig said...

Hey,

I survived just fine. I even like..."I Killed Him My Way."

Crime Scene Christie

MsHellion said...

*ROTFLMAO* I'd read any of them! Hysterical! Your title is what got me to pick up your book in the first place...

And I totally knew the M*A*S*H reference.

Hmmm, titles. I so suck at this--let me think...

MsHellion said...

Still Killing You (Scorpions)

Don’t Know Who You’ve Shot Till He’s Gone (Cinderella)

The Guns of Summer (Don Henley)

Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door (Hey, don’t have to change it!)

Shot Through the Heart, and I’m to Blame—I Give Assassination the Bombay Name (see I told you I stunk at this)

Lay All Your Hits on Me (ABBA)

Spastic Heron With Rickets (ABBA—best I could substitute for Dancing Queen—which I believe might have been my favorite line of the new book, but I laughed every page, so it’s hard to say.)

What Do You Do For Money, Bombay (ACDC)

Givin the Vic a Hit (ACDC)

Let Me Put My Bullet Into You (ACDC)

Straight Through the Heart (Bryan Adams)

Cuts Like a Knife (Bryan Adams—and also doesn’t have to be changed!)

When You Kill Somebody (Bryan Adams)

Stairway to Assassination (Led Zeppelin)

Like a Hitman (Madonna)

Sex and Bullets (Marcy’s Playground)

I’ve Got You Under My Rifle Sight (Frank again)

These Guns Were Made For Shootin’

50 Ways to Kill Your Victim

MsHellion said...

Duh, 50 Ways to Kill Your Lover...that'd probably fit more. *LOL*

terrio said...

So, MsHellion sent me over here and now I have to think of titles. Only, I ordered both books last night on Amazon - also because of MsHellion.

But...let me think.

The Gangster of Death (some people call me Maurice...)

Do You Really Want to Kill Me? (Boy George would be proud)

We Are the Assassins..my friends

Live and Let Die - no change there

You're Gonna Kill Me - little ode to Dreamgirls

Another One Bites the Dust - again, no change

People Who Kill People - Ah, Babs

Assassin's Daughter - Gotta have a little Loretta

Gotta go make dinner now, this is fun! Maybe I'll come back.

MsHellion said...

Yeah, well, you'll call me, howling in laughter about the spastic heron, just wait. So worth it.

terrio said...

I wasn't complaining, just mentioning that I will already have the prize, though I'd love to have the signed one too.

Cuffs Will Keep Us Together

Bye Bye Bye...no change

Smells Like Gun Powder - You know Kurt would appreciate that one. K, sorry, that was bad

Oops, I Did It Again - no change

You Oughta Die - come on, that's what Alannis was saying through the song anyway.

Sin said...

MsHellion got me totally stuck on this series. I loved Gin and Dak's stories! You're brilliantly funny.

How about for a title, "All We Need Are Guns" (a little play off of- "All we need is love") ? Or is that too close to the last one? LOL

Leslie Langtry said...

OMG! I should have thought of doing this a long time ago! You guys have some great stuff - I'll have to send both of you a book! I especially like "Like A Hitman" and "People Who Kill People" (are the luckiest people in the world...)but there are many, many possibilities here! And I think we all listen to the same music! Mshellion and Terrio - e-mail me at leslie@leslielangtry.com!

terrio said...

Yippee! Happy to help. And always happy to have a signed copy. I've emailed with my address. Thanks so much and I'm glad MsHellion suggested I come over here.

She really is your biggest stalk...errr...fan. hehehe

Leslie Langtry said...

Sin,
Thanks! I love hearing that! I think I love my fans as much, if not more, than they could ever love me! You're the best!

Les

bookmobiler said...

What I'd like to know is if you fabulous editor has finished her therapy yet?

Jenyfer Matthews said...

Late the the party as usual, but here are my contributions:

Hit Me with Your Best Shot (no change)

Killing me Softly With His Gun

Shot Through the Heart and You're to Blame (you give love a bad name)

What??? I never claimed I was any good at titles!

Gemma Halliday said...

ROFLMAO!

Do You Really Want to Kill Me? (Boy George would be proud)

I love this one!
Oh, man, I shouldn't have read this post while drinking coffee. Must go change now...

~Gemma

terrio said...

Sorry to make you spew, Gemma. LOL!

So Mshellion and I were chatting this morning and these came to me a la Elvis. Had to post them.

You Ain't Nothing But An Assassin (or Target)
Can't Help Killing You
Avoiding the Jailhouse Rock (not so good)
Kill Me Tender
Suspicious Minds - no change needed. *g*

Maybe those weren't worth posting...hmmmmm

Tori Lennox said...

THE GUN WILL COME OUT, TOMORROW

This is my favorite!

Let's see, some other fun possible titles...

Brand New Luger (Dead or Alive--appropriate!)

I Hate Myself for Shooting You (Joan Jett)

Girls Just Want to Have Guns (Cyndi Lauper)

Leslie Langtry said...

Wow! You guys are really talented! Sin, Jenyfer and Tori - since you guys gave me some good material and a lot of laughs, send me an e-mail at leslie@leslielangtry.com and I'll send each of you a book. Thanks for all your encouragement! Until next week when I blog again - Viva la Bombays!

Jenyfer said...

Leslie,
Yeah! I'll email you when the net on my half of the world is back up and running well!!