Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Lessons I've Learned

WINNER, WINNER, WINNER!

Linda C. please contact me at www.christie@christie-craig.com and give me your home addy so I can send your gifts.

Thanks for posting everyone. Remember, read Wedding and get ready for some trivia questions to the big basket prize.

Crime Scene Christie


Okay, my husband sent me a humorous email that had some funny age appropriate truths. I enjoyed it so much that I decided to write my own truths. So here are some things I’ve learned on my jolly little path called life.

P.S. Pop over to http://toberead.wordpress.com/2008/06/10/why-can%e2%80%99t-life-be-like-a-romance-novel-3/ to read another blog by yours truely. There's also a contest over there!


Hard truths I learned as a Kid
1) Your mom will eventually find the vegetables you didn’t eat and you hid behind the refrigerator.
2) Your dog probably won’t eat your broccoli, but if he does don’t let him sleep with you that night.
3) When your mom changes your younger brother’s diaper, don’t stand too close.
4) Never trust the girl next door to cut your hair.
5) When learning how to ride a bike, never use your brother’s bicycle.
6) When the boy next door says he’ll show you his, if you’ll show him yours, make him go first.
7) When your brother tells you to pull his finger, don’t!



Hard truths I learned as a Teenager

1) Getting caught by your granddaddy who is only wearing his underwear when you’re receiving your first kiss isn’t the end of the world, even though it feels like it.
2) Never kiss a guy when you have the hiccups.
3) Never beat a guy at arm wrestling if you want him to like you.
4) Always retie your bikini top before diving off the high dive.
5) When the boy next door says he wants to show you his favorite toy, he’s not talking about his Rubik cube. Basically, stay away from the boy next door.
6) When cleaning your brother’s room, never look under his mattress. And if you do, don’t go show mom. Your brother will never forgive you, but it does sort of get even for him asking you to pull his finger.

Hard Truths I learned as an Adult

1) The sheer agony of childbirth is easy compared to raising the child but it’s worth it when you first hold the precious bundle.
2) When a man says he doesn’t want you anymore, you are usually a lucky gal. Divorce is survivable; being married to some jerk is a lot harder.
3) Just because one man you loved did you wrong, doesn’t mean the next one will. Love deserves a chance.
4) Raising teenagers makes nailing pudding to a wall look easy.
5) If you son asks you to pull his finger, don’t! (Is that hereditary?)
6) Wrinkles don’t hurt until you get a new prescription for your glasses.
7) When you find out the boy who used to live next door to you is a preacher, don’t laugh too hard because the person telling you the news probably belongs to the church and will want an explanation for your laughter.
8) Never let age stop you from feeling young.
Because it’s still June and because it is my release month for Weddings Can Be Murder, I’m giving away some more note cards and a Sexy, Suspenseful and Seriously Funny Tee-shirt. So post away. Tell me some truths you’ve learned. Or tell me where you’ve seen Weddings Can Be Murder on a store shelf.

Also, I’m going to be holding a big contest at the end of June. I’ll be asking some questions about the Weddings Can Be Murder plot. The people who answer the questions correctly, will be put in a drawing to win a Pamper Me Like a Bride basket. Inside, I’ll have great books, chocolate, candles, a Tee-shirt, and other goodies. So pick up a copy of Weddings and be ready to answer a few questions.

Crime Scene Christie

P.S. Don’t forget that next Sunday is Father’s Day. Happy Father’s Day dad!

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

Christie,
I loved your "Truths". They got me laughing so hard this morning. Maybe because they are all so "True". After the weekend I had (Bad storms here in Michigan and no power since Sunday) I needed a laugh.

Linda C

Kim Lenox said...

Thanks for starting my day with a smile, Christie! Love the grandad in the underwear one! Ah, memories ...

Christie Craig said...

Linda C,

Jeepers. I'm glad you are okay. And I'm glad I gave you something to laugh about.

Take care.

Crime Scene Christie

Christie Craig said...

Kim,

Thanks for stopping by. Yup, those darn memories are killers. To this day when I think about it I get red.

Crime Scene Christie

Faye Hughes said...

Great post, Christie! Those truths are so, well, true. LOL.

Also, Christie didn't mention it, guys, but she's also blogging over at PASIC's 2BRead blog this morning. PASIC is the published authors chapter of RWA.

2BRead

terrio said...

Truth: If a man continually tells *little* lies, those lies will get bigger and more frequent until they do major damage. Walk away early and quickly.

Love these, Christie. Especially that bicycle one. Learned that the hard way. Unfortunately, also learned that "Divorce is survivable" one the hard way. Though I'm much better off on this side of it. *g* What doesn't kill us makes us stronger, right? Though I have trouble with that next one...

Christie Craig said...

Terrio,

Love your truth. It is so true.

The bike incident wasn't fun and just thinking about it makes me cringe.

And Terrio, there is some good guys out there. You just got to be very selective. I know, I snagged my hubby after my first disaster. Good luck.

Crime Scene Christie

Christie Craig said...

Faye,

Great minds work a like!!

Thanks girl.

Crime Scene Christie

Lark said...

Fun blog, Christie.

Here are the lessons I've learned:

If a man tells you he's breaking up with you because you're too good for him, you probably are.

Never give yourself a haircut after three alcoholic beverages of any kind.

Happiness is what you choose to pay attention to.

Lark

MsHellion said...

OMG, I love these truths...especially the one about "stay away from the boy next door" and "don't laugh when you find out he's a preacher now"--but most especially "divorce is survivable" (which I term to mean, you can fix a broken heart--but why continue living with someone who doesn't love you like you deserve. That's a hard one to learn. People hate to be alone.)

Truths, truths.

If you feel compelled to go to your class reunion to show the jocks you "arrived", prepare to be disappointed. They're going to spend the whole night focusing on crap you did in high school that you spent 10 years and $10,000 in therapy to forget. Stay home...or go to a different class reunion and pretend you came in the middle of senior year and they just don't remember you. I assure you, you'll have more fun.

IF you borrowed your best friend's t-shirt to wear to school, get into a fight on the bus ride home, and have a free for all in the middle of the driveway, be prepared to walk home shirtless--and if asked by your father what just happened, say, "Nothing."

Understand that some of the people you couldn't live without in highschool or college aren't always going to be people you can live without. There may come a day when you or them will find you make better acquaintances than best friends. Accept it and you'll be happier. You'll make new friends who fit where you are in your life RIGHT NOW, not who you were in high school or college.

Jo Anne said...

Hey, Christie - fun, fun, fun - as always.

Really enjoyed the party Saturday. Tell Steve he can wash dishes at my house anytime. What a guy!! (Folks, Christie's Steve is definitely Hero material with a capital H.) Christie, you can tell the red wine story in some future blog. Good 'ol Wine Away. :-)

The hunky, wild boy in high school who grew up to be a preacher was nice then and is nice now. At our (God forbid) 40th reunion, I enjoyed him as much as I did back then.

As for truths - never brush the dog right after you've applied lip gloss. :-)

Congrats on your new release, Christie. Can't wait to read it!!

Jo Anne

Christie Craig said...

Lark,

I love, love your truths.

And your last one is truest truth of all.

Thanks for posting.

Crime Scene Christie

Christie Craig said...

Mshellion,

Great truths. Love the ones about class reunions. About friends. And goodness, who wants to be alone. It's scary, and it's hard to see that sometimes being alone is better than being with someone who mistreats you.

Thanks for posting!

Crime Scene Christie

Christie Craig said...

Jo Anne,

I'm laughing so hard here. And when you read Weddings, you will understand why. I swear guys, there was nothing going on when my hubby washed Jo Anne's dishes. :-)

Yes, I will have to blog about the whole wine story. The funny thing was hubby wasn't even drinking. And yes, he is a hero.

Hmm...I can visualize the truth about combing a dog and lip gloss.

Thanks for posting girl.

Crime Scene Christie

P.S. We had a blast at your party. Loved meeting your daughter.

Keri Ford said...

The quicker you learn ages 16-18 are NOT the most important years of your life, the quicker you'll grow up.

Loved all these! And must make a note to have weddings read in time for basket-o-stuff!

Christie Craig said...

Keri,

Your truth needs to be written up in a bible somewhere.

Thanks for posting.

Crime Scene Christie

catslady said...

Great truths!

My contribution: If you're planning a wedding, things WILL go wrong.

Christie Craig said...

Ahh, Catslady,

That is soo true.

Thanks for posting.

Crime Scene Christie

Ms Terry in Gadsden said...

since i didnt read your blog til just now and its already sunday.
i dont know if you or anyone else will see this post but.
about that boy next door. i been meaning to ask you LOL. It's funny how we remember certain things from being a teenager. LOL

Christie Craig said...

It is funny what we remember, isn't it, girl?

Ahh, the good ol' days.

Crime Scene Christie