What Would Miss Manners Say?

Happy Labor Day!!!!!

So last week I blogged about the funny things that people say, without even knowing it. I had one of those experiences last week and thought I would share. Before I get started with my story, however, I want everyone to know - I promise I am fine. There is nothing seriously wrong and I promise you will all have to put up with me for years to come.

I had a raging respiratory infection (a common side effect of my horrible allergies) and went to my family doctor on Tuesday morning for a round of antibiotics. I had also noticed that while putting on deodorant for the last couple of weeks, my armpit seemed sensative (and I know you were all dying to know about the state of my armpits). Since this is where lymph nodes are located, I figured I better ask about that as well. Now, my family doctor is very thorough and in my opinion somewhat panicky (or adverse to a malpractice lawsuit, take your pick), so he checks everything, does a full blood workup, then wants to send me out to a bevy of specialists to "rule out" anything serious.

So my first trip is to my gynocologist who agrees with me that it's an infected hair folicle, but orders the mammogram anyway because I am going to be forty this week (a whole other discussion). That was on Thursday. On Friday, I had an appointment with an oncologist (otherwise known as a cancer specialist). Now, my experience with doctors has always been that the more specialized they are, the less personality they have. It almost seems that the more medical knowledge is shoved in their minds, the less social skills they have available. This doctor was no exception.

He studies my blood work, inspects my lymph nodes - both in the armpit in question and everywhere else. Then he steps back, looks at me and says in all seriousness, "Well, I'm not impressed."

It was all I could do not to laugh. What a thing to say to someone who is seeing you to make sure they don't have cancer. You're not impressed??????? What is the appropriate answer to that - "Yeah, I'm glad!" or maybe "I'm sorry to disappoint you."

I managed to hold it in until I got into my car to call my worried husband and give him the good news. Then I started laughing. What a nutcase! And I'm absolutely positive he didn't and never would see a thing wrong with what he'd said.

All the same, for the first time in my life, I'm really happy to have disappointed a doctor. :)

- Deadly (but nowhere near dead) DeLeon