Saturday, April 19, 2008

The road to erotica is paved with...comedy

Oh, you all are in for a treat today. Please join me in welcoming Crystal Jordan, my lovely fab friend and conference roomie. Her books are hawt, fun, hawt, exciting, and… did I mention hawt?! Her book, Treasured, comes out Tuesday from Samhain Publishing and I highly recommend you all rush out and buy it. I know I will! So, take it away, Crystal...

I started out a chick lit writer two years ago. If anyone (all two of you) has read one of my currently published books, that might surprise you--because I am unrepentantly (I think I just made that word up) erotic in my writing now.

I came up with an amazingly fresh and wonderful new concept (or so I thought) of a paranormal chick lit novel about a 20-something witch in Manhattan. Witch lit--I liked it. Yeah. Then I read Candace Havens, MaryJanice Davidson, and Shanna Swendson.

Well, there really is no such thing as an original idea is there?

So, I stalled with that book and came up with another idea. This one was naughty. Titillating. Totally daring. And one I was never letting see the light of day, because, I, Crystal Jordan, was a chick lit author, thank you very much. That's just how I roll. But I needed something to kick start my writing while my witchy lit book percolated at the back of my twisted little mind. The wild hair up my you-know-what idea was erotic science fiction romance.

Keep in mind, I'd read maybe three or four erotic romance novels in my more-than-a-decade of romance readership. But I was never letting anyone see it anyway, so why not give it a try? It couldn't hurt. I didn't have to know anything about the genre if I wasn't going to do anything with the book, right? Right. Totally.

After I finished the first three chapters of that book, I went back and read what I, chick lit writer extraordinaire, had written. It was actually pretty good. Maybe even better than my witch lit. And I'd even kind of...liked it.

Oh, snap.

Now what was I going to do? I was a pornographic witch lit writer! A failure! A disgrace! (A minor mental meltdown combined with a slight identity crises ensued, but I've heard that's pretty normal for those still in the 20-somethings)

Yeah, then I slapped some sense into myself and started doing some research. This erotic thing was not a bad place to be in the market at that time, apparently. I wrote emotional, deep, a little dark...erotic romance.

And it sold.

On the first try.

Whoa, didn't see that coming.

Score! (Thus ensued a booty dance that registered on the Richter scale--I won't reenact. Trust me, it's for your own good.)

But...but...I loved my comedy. I missed it. Deep, dark, and emotionally contorted was all well and good, but there's nothing like a little snark to make the writing snap a bit. So, I sat down and wrote a viciously sarcastic heroine and her studly sex-muffin (and equally sarcastic) hero. They were dark, kinky, twisted, kinky, scarred, kinky, and funny as hell.

Ah, now that's that's what I'm talking about.

I can't say I'm always able to write funny, but there's always some humor in my books. It's like a nervous tick--I just can't help myself. Life is freaking ridiculous. And if the world is going to get a laugh at my expense, I might as well join in, right?

How else would I have ended up going from witch lit to erotica in two-point-five seconds?

That's just how I roll.

~Crystal Jordan


Crystal Jordan said...

Thanks for having me! That was a fun post to come up with--LOL!

Dana Belfry said...

You are too funny! This book is totally going to be on my to-be-read pile! Keep the stories coming Crystal!

Crystal Jordan said...

Oh, I'll keep it coming for you, Dana. Don't I always? ;-)

R.G. ALEXANDER said...

"How else would I have ended up going from witch lit to erotica in two-point-five seconds?

That's just how I roll."

LOL! Great post!! I think I speak for all your readers everywhere when I say-we're so glad you did. Think of all the "pearls" of humor, emotion and hot hot nookie we could have missed.
BTW if you don't get the pearls reference, read Treasured!! But keep plenty of ice water nearby.

Gemma Halliday said...

Thanks for coming to play with us, Crystal!

I gotta say, I read the excerpt for Treasured and LOVE the premise. Pirate booty does it for me every time. ;)


Crystal Jordan said...

Well, if they read the warning label on that book, they might get the "pearls" reference. Hee.

Crystal Jordan said...

Well, there's TONS of pirate booty in that book, Gemma. I promise. Girl Scouts honor. (Can I say that if they kicked me out of Scouts?)

Gwen Hayes said...

I don't think you could ever not be funny--so it makes sense that it shines through even your dark, kinky stuff.

Thanks for inspiring us.

Crystal Jordan said...

Awwww. Thanks, Gwendy!

Kathy Bacus said...

Thanks, Crystal, for hanging out with us at Killer Fiction today. Majorly fun post!

And sadly, I'm guessing there are no fresh, original ideas--just out of the box (or maybe in your case, 'kinky') new takes on familiar themes.

Love your 'pirate' cover, by the way.

~Bullet Hole Bacus~

Crystal Jordan said...

Thanks, Kathy! And, yeah, no new ideas, just ones I rehash for the amusement of others.

And isn't he hawt? Anne Cain is a genius cover artist!

Jennifer McKenzie said...

LMAO!!!! You're so funny! Witch Lit!!!
Yeah, like any of your heroines are any thing but sarcastic and snarky.

Amie Stuart said...


Crystal...I started writing chick lit too!!! and so did Susan Lyons *ggg*

LOVE that cover!

Crystal Jordan said...

Yes, my heroines are NOTHING like me, Jen. *adjusts halo*

Crystal Jordan said...

Amie...I knew it wasn't just me!

Anonymous said...

Ah, I missed this yesterday.
You are one funny chick--but I already knew that. I didn't know you had your heart set on writing chic lit. Very interesting! :)
Great post, Crystal.

Crystal Jordan said...

It's one of those dirty little secrets every writer has, Jenn. Ah, well! We all have to start somewhere, right? Then we sort of figure things out as we go and see where we end up.