Yes, I'm totally serious. I need help scaring my 12-yr old. I've tried Bill Cosby's Chicken Heart, The Thing (which the Boston Globe calls the scariest movie ever), Paranormal Activity, Alien, even The Ring. She yawned. And then she asked me why any of those things were scary.
When I was 14, we had a sleepover and watched Halloween. I didn't sleep for a month. When I was 8, I had this very strange fear of swallowing my tongue. (As I write this, I'm trying to see if I can.) When I was 9, I would check out every book from the library on vampires and sleep with three scarves around my throat, holding a crucifix my mom had on the wall (and no, I didn't burst into flame.)
And yet, my daughter, the one who sleeps with the light on...the one who freaked out when we came home and the screen was off the front window (due to one obese cat - not a psycho killer awaiting our return from trumpet lessons)...has yet to find a movie, book or tv show that scares her.
This is probably my fault. When the kids were toddlers, we would have Lord of the Ring movie marathons. The Orcs frightened me more than them. AND, they have no fear of clowns either (maybe I should try It?). My ex-brother-in-law feared clowns above all else. He had a t-shirt that said, "Can't Sleep...Clowns Will Eat Me..."
I'm open to your wise suggestions, my evil minions. Help me scare my kid.
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Posted by Leslie Langtry at 12:48 AM