Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Fate, Epiphanies & Boats

Opps! Opps!

Last week I posted that Kimmy had won the prize on my "Call" blog. Well, duh, I goofed. It wasn't Kimmy. It was Kammy. So . . . Kammy, if you are out there. Please email me, through my website address, and give me your snail mail so I can get your prize to you.

Crime Scene Christie

I’m sitting here wondering what I should blog about, and leave it to my husband to save the day. Poor guy, he doesn’t ask to star in so many of my blogs, but somehow he manages to always get there by just being himself. And if he isn’t DOING something blog-worthy, he’s reminding me of something he DID that was blog worthy.

This time, he simply walked in and asked one question, “Hey, you want to take the day off and let’s take the boat out and do some fishing?”

Ah-ha! Like magic, my mind shuffles through my memory bank and finds the perfect blog. A blog about fate, about epiphanies. About . . . boats. If you are like me, you probably don’t know much about boats, but I’ll bet you guys know a thing or two about fate and epiphanies, right?

Now, this blog-worthy situation goes back 16 years. I was flying back from a writer’s conference. I walk out of the plane, looking for hubby and son. (This was when they could meet you at the gate.) They are always there, on time. Hey, they love me. But this time, there are not there. Did they decide to replace me while I was gone?

Thirty minutes pass before a very hurried, very ragged, dressed in old clothes, and smelling like sun screen, hubby and four-year-old son appear running down the airport toward my gate. Hubby gives me a guilty greeting. Son shifts nervously from one foot to the other. The foot shifting is a sign of one of two things. He’s gotta pee, or he’s got a secret and he’s just dying to tell it.

I look from Hubby’s guilty expression to son. “Stevie, do you need to go to the bathroom?”

He shifts back and forth. “No.” He glances at his dad, looks as if he’s gonna burst if he doesn’t spill the beans. Okay, now I start worrying. Then son blurted it out. “Daddy and I bought a boat.”

I relaxed a little knowing I hadn’t been replaced, then it hit me, and I eyed my hubby. “You mean a toy boat, right? Plastic?”

Son shook his head. “Nope. A real boat. A big, really big boat.”

I looked back at hubby. I totally got the guilty expression then. Remember, hubby’s cheap, right? Well, hubby had long since implemented a household rule. One never made a purchase over $200 without first speaking to the other. This rule was etched in stone.

And something told me this big, really big boat, might have run a bit more than $200. Jeepers, that really big boat probably ran about the same amount of the living room suite I’d been wanting to buy, but hubby had suggested we wait until we pay off a few more bills. Hmm…

Hubby cleared his throat. “I can explain.”

“I’ll just bet you can,” I said. “And I’ll give you the chance to do that right after I buy my new living room suite.”

He flinched, and I knew it was because he was already trying to figure out how much this little bit of fate was going to cost him. Yup, he knew that new living room furniture was as good as mine.

As we headed to baggage claim, hubby started explaining, desperately trying to get out of sleeping on the sofa—especially since that sofa had about two springs that if sat on just right, could perform a colonoscopy .

Hubby continued, “I was doing my morning chores, thinking it was the perfect weather to be out on the water. I opened the paper and darn if I’m not in the want ads and right there is an ad for a johnboat. Then I turned the page and ended up on the obituary section. And I saw it . . . Ted Smith—the same Ted Smith I went to school with. And right there, sitting on the throne,” (yup, that was his morning chore) “I had an epiphany. It was a sign and I knew it.”

He paused. “Aren’t you going to ask me what kind of sign?”

I looked at him. “Sure I am, but I’m still trying to figure out if I want to go with the paisley material for the sofa or the solid material.”

He blinked and continued. “What the sign meant is that I had to start living life before it was too late. I had to buy that boat.”

Now, I’ll admit that it was a good story, and convincing since I’m a big believer in fate and all. But it was not good enough to prevent me from getting a new living room suite. And I was leaning toward the paisley material.

Now, the story doesn’t end with the new paisley sofa, with the new set of chairs and coffee table. Oh, no, it gets much better. You see, two days later, hubby got a call from another old school buddy. Did he know poor Ted Smith had passed? I heard hubby saying that yep, he’d seen the obituaries. Then I heard hubby say… “No, you’re kidding. No!”

He hung up and just stared at me. “What?” I asked.

He turned white. “Uhh, I just found out what Ted died of.”


He turned even whiter. “Uh, a . . .a boating accident.”

Okay, now no disrespect to Ted, but I couldn’t help laughing. And then I wrote that up and sent in it in to Reader’s Digest. And they paid me $400 for that little story. Hubby still insisted that it had been fate and the $400 dollars went to help pay for the boat. Of course, I insisted that it helped pay for the living room suite.

So . . . was it fate? Have you guys ever had an epiphany? Ever got a nice piece of furniture, or gift, because your hubby messed up? If so, share. I’d love to hear about it.

Crime Scene Christie


Terri Osburn said...

I always feel good about being single after reading your blogs. LOL! My ex did one thing similar to this.

Two weeks before the wedding (read: I'm stressed to the max!) he comes home with a new truck. To get this truck, he traded in the other truck that he had just sunk $1500 into having fixed. He also forked over $400 cash in addition to the trade. And at the time, he already had another car that toted its own car payment. Plus, I had a car. Now, if you're keeping up with the math here, we now have three vehicles, three car payments and we just lost $1900 in the deal.

Needless to say, I threw the ring at him. The dumbest thing I ever did was put it back on. *sigh*

Anonymous said...


Girl, I always get a laugh out of your blogs, and this one was no exception. lol.


Christie Craig said...


I don't blame you for flinging your ring at your ex. I'd have probably done the same.

Thanks for dropping by, girl!

Crime Scene Christie

Christie Craig said...


Well, I'm glad my life makes you laugh. *smile*

Thanks for dropping by!

Crime Scene Christie

Colleen Thompson said...

Thanks for sharing a great laugh!

Christie Craig said...


Hey, we all need a chuckle every now and then.

Crime Scene Christie

Anonymous said...


I think one of my best fate stories is when I quit my teaching job and got called about another teaching job, went to the website and saw your articles posted all over it. Of course, I called you. We hadn't run into each other in ages. We wound up talking and walking miles of calories off our bodies, and I ended up rejoining and loving RWA the second time around and learning so much! Fate can be wow-fantastic. And yes, YOU helped convince me to stay home and WRITE.


Christie Craig said...

Ahh, Nancy,

That's one of my favorite fate stories, too.

And we need get back to walking those calories off.

Crime Scene Christie

Keri Ford said...

HA! Great story, Christie. So far my hubby hasn't tried to pull anything like this. He's pretty good about saving his money up before he buys.

Christie Craig said...


That's what made this whole thing even funnier. My hubby never spends money. I was stunned he'd done it.

Thanks for popping in.

Crime Scene Christie

Anonymous said...

That was a great story! It reminds of the time my husband wanted to buy a trolling motor. He had saved up all his pocket change and birthday money (from my parents) and set out to get one. First he kept asking me if he could buy one. "It's your money" I tell him. Well he finds one at a sporting goods store that was going out of business on sale.

He's so excited he calls me at work with the good news. He gets to the check out and it was discounted even more. He calls again even more excited. Geessh Men and their toys LOL

Linda C

Shari C said...

My husband and I were watching TV and on one those Sunday night editorial programs they were talking about people in the USA having all this money owed to them that the states were holding because they couldn't locate the owners. They then told how you could check on the internet if you were owed any money that a state was holding for you. My husband laughingly said I should check for my name and so I did...my home state was holding money from years back and in about 30 days I received a very nice check which I certainly enjoyed receiving. Would never have looked into the idea if my husband hadn't said something. It was very strange as we normally don't watch this TV program and we usually pay no attention to such deals that say you might have money coming as we figure...yeah, sure, what a line. Well, surprisingly enough, this time it was real.

Anonymous said...

ROFL! That was an extra expensive boat. *g*

Estella said...

Great story, Christie!

Christie Craig said...

Linda C.

They say the only difference between men and boys is the prize of their toys. Your hubby sounds like a real keeper. I know my hubby, who seldom buys a toy, is a keeper too.

And I have to admit, I do love going out in the boat. And hmm...we've since gotten a new living room suite, but the boat is still with us.

Crime Scene Christie

Francyne said...

Of course I have a "fate" story, but if I told it your blog would be permanently shut down by the blog police.

Christie Craig said...

Shari C.

Now that is fabulous fate. Wow!!

I hope it was for a big check.

I've heard about those lists. I think my daughter jumped on once to see if any of us were on the list and . . . no cigar!!

Thanks for sharing.

Crime Scene Christie

Christie Craig said...


Yep, and it looked good in my living room too!!

Thanks for popping in.

Crime Scene Christie

Christie Craig said...


My husband says, I have to stay married to him now because what else would I blog about. He's always good for a laugh.

Thanks for posting.

Crime Scene Christie

Christie Craig said...


Hmm...I'm trying to guess what it could be!!

Fate could be when you show up at "almost" your first RWA meeting you sit next to some who turns out to be a lifelong friend!

Thanks for posting.

Crime Scene Christie

Kammie said...

I'm dancing and I'm laughing. Dancing because I think the Kammy which was Kimmy is really me, Kammie. lol I don't see any Kimmy or Kammy that posted that day, and Kammy sounds exactly like Kammie and I remember posting. I'm going head on over to your site and send in my email with my fingers crossed that it's my lucky day. Oh, and I'll be laughing, too, because that's a great story about your hubby and the boat.

Christie Craig said...

Thanks Kammie!

You have a great day and I'll get you that prize ASAP.

Crime Scene Christie

catslady said...

Last year I lost a ring my husband had given me for my 40th birthday. I was heartbroken over the loss. Well the next day was our 39th wedding anniversary and he bought me a ring (trying to get the same one but ended up with an even nicer one). The next day I found my original ring. I had rubbed some cream onto his neck for him and while washing it off, apparently the ring came off in the towel. I found it when I went to wash clothes. It's a wonder it didn't roll under the furnace or washing machine. Had it not been our anniversary the next day I'm sure I never would have gotten my new ring.

Tracy Madison said...

Christie, I loved this story so much I read it to my husband. He laughed too. :)

Christie Craig said...


How ingenious! LOL. Okay, Okay, I know you didn't do it on purpose. But what a great idea.

Girls, we need to remember this one.

Crime Scene Christie

Christie Craig said...


And hey, I'll bet he was siding with the hubby, too! LOL!

Thanks so much for coming over.

Crime Scene Christie

Anonymous said...

ALl i can think to say at this time is Im. ROFLMAO. just when i think these true life storys cant get any funnier it happens again.
Christie , im so glad your a part of my life. Who knew in grammar school that you would be the one to brighten my day close to 40 years later. LOL LOL LOL.

RM Kahn said...

Love the Story! In the early days of my marriage to my hubby (of 13 years now), he still liked to go to strip clubs with his single buddies. I was never thrilled with the idea but I said, "sure, why not?" Then I saw the tab for the night and instantly instituted a new rule that I get an equal amount to what he spends, that I can spend as I want. William's-Sonoma, here I come! Needless to say, the visits to the strip clubs dwindled down to rare and then not at all. Which is fine by me! (I still manage to get my visits into my favorite cooking store)