Wednesday, March 28, 2012

The Adulterer's Unofficial Guide to Family Vacations is ALIVE! IT'S ALIVE!

Well my beloved minions, it's officially out! THE ADULTERER'S UNOFFICIAL GUIDE TO FAMILY VACATIONS is up! That is, at least it's up at Amazon and Smashwords. Barnes & Noble has been, shall we say, a bit sluggish - but they assure me they're working on it.

So for this week and until April 5, I'm offering it for only 99cents! You guys have been soooooooo unbelievably patient with me on this (for some reason you must like me or something) - it's the least I can do. But, on the 5th, it turns into a pumpkin...a $3.99 pumpkin, that is...if pumpkins are $3.99, have pink covers and lots of love scenes inside them.

I'm also working with a designer who is, as we speak, formatting the book and cover to be sold at Amazon as a trade paperback - for those of you who like actual books. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

It's been a looooooong journey and I've learned more than I ever wanted to about this process. But I am working on the next, great thing and I've decided to share a snippet with y'all, because I'm so damned happy I got this book up!

So here it is, an untitled work (because my title muse is a bitch AND on vacation):

Chapter 1

The first thing that told me something was wrong was the slight difference in inflection when Carlos said my name.

“Myron.” His voice, which had been light, in accordance with our contract, was different. It was the way he bruised the vowels…although I don’t suppose “y” is a vowel, but it does sound like one. His throat was thick on the “M” and his tongue wrestled with “yron,” using a tone you’d reserve for a Republican politician found with a dead prostitute or Russian figure skater.

My blood chilled to gelatin and just sat there, sluggish in my veins – refusing to move any further.

“Myron,” He said again with a finality that sucked all breath from my lungs. “The plan has changed.”

A few days ago, I was simply Myron Smith. A non-descript but wealthy, middle-aged man with a loathsome profession and a self-esteem vacancy that made the Grand Canyon look like a plastic, Kmart kiddie pool. I was bored to death.

Myron. How I suddenly wished my name had been something tough that tangled my assailant’s tongue, making it hard to sound menacing. Why couldn’t I have been Duke or Jack? Hell, at this point Virgil or Herman sounded better. I wanted to be anywhere but here – which is ironic because I’d been looking forward to this for months.

Four hours was the original arrangement. Less than that and I’d feel as important as an assistant PTA vice-treasurer at a suburban preschool. More than that and they assured me this would get old. Four hours was the agreement. And I would’ve mentioned this, were it not for an unfortunately placed strip of duct tape covering my lips. I now realized that particular extra had been fifty dollars badly spent.

Carlos must have seen something cowering in my eyes. He grinned and stepped forward, smashing his fist into the side of my head. My vision swam with my brain as it sloshed around in my skull. Well, that couldn’t be good.

I groaned, as much as anyone could through duct tape. I had specifically crossed “physical abuse” out of the contract. I’d initialed it and everything. I know, I’m a pussy. But I had a meeting with my board of directors in two days and didn’t want them to know what I’d been up to.

My vision zigzagged before me as I watched Carlos flip open a cell phone and move to the other side of the room. He kept his back toward me so that all I could hear was murmuring. I wondered who he was talking to. Was this part of the plan? And I really, really needed to talk to him about hitting me…at least, before he did it again.

Black Bag, LLC had been very professional when I met with them. They had promised there was no room for error. I’d even taken Dan, my attorney, with me to make sure. To his credit, Dan thought this was a stupid idea. I was now beginning to agree with him.

What do you think?

The Assassin


L. j. Charles said...

I can hardly wait for your new book to be released! What a tantalizing snippet. There simply aren't enough Leslie Langtry books available. Probably I should start at the beginning and read them all again. Except the newest is calling my name and might have to be shuffled to the top of my TBR pile. I purchased it yesterday and it's burning a hole in my kindle.

Love your books, Leslie. Please don't ever stop writing.
L. j.

Leslie Langtry said...

Oh my god, L.J.! You have made my WEEK! Thank you so much! I'm writing as fast as I can!

PATRICIA said...

Heading to Amazon to right now, clicking one for me and one as a gift for my sis.

Leslie Langtry said...

Thanks Patricia! And it's finally up for Nook. I don't know why it took so long.

Terri Osburn said...

You have outdone yourself!! That is AMAZING!!! How close are you to having that finished?? Because we are not going to continue to be this patient. LOL!

As to Adulterer's Guide - I LOVE THIS BOOK!! Can't believe I got to read it BEFORE it was out and now everyone else will get to see how great it is. And HAWT!

Seriously. Dudes. Err...Dudettes. Have a cold drink close by.

Leslie Langtry said...

LOL Terri! And a HUGE congrats on your being a Golden Heart Finalist! I'll be rooting for you!

Mo said...

Just bought it for my kindle. I love your work, please keep on writing !!

Leslie Langtry said...

Thanks Mo!

Gemma Halliday said...

Love, love, love it! Ordering my copy now! (Okay, I've already read it, but I want an official Kindle copy, too!)

Leslie Langtry said...

I'm glad you said you'd read it - I wouldn't want anyone to think I forged your blurb!

Christie Craig said...

Congrats, Leslie!!!

Go have a glass of wine and celebrate large.


Leslie Langtry said...

Once I get home from chauffering 2 kids to five places, I will! Thanks Christie!

PATRICIA said...

Quick! Someone who has read "The Adulterer's..." needs to go to Amazon and review the book. I check out the site everyday (after Killer Fiction, of course), and dropped an email to them letting them know that Leslie's book was only 99 cents for an extremely short time. They answered back that they usually don't mention a book until it has at least one review. I wrote back and said I thought that was in the Catch 22 category, I mean really - if you don't know about the book, how can you read and review it?!? (Insert huge sigh here....)

Terri Osburn said...

I posted a review, Patricia. Should be good to go now!