Saturday, September 17, 2011

Guest Author Lucy Woodhull

You’re Either with Us or Against Us

There are many great debates in life: Liberal vs. Conservative; Catholicism vs. Scientology; and, most importantly, pie vs. cake. For pie people, the crust is king. Cake lovers need no such flaky embellishments. The pie vs. cake question has divided sorrowful nations and households for too long! What is the answer? Hell if I know. I'm just a writer.

The hero and heroine in my romantic comedy space opera RAGNAR AND JULIET face just such a harrowing conflict. Sure, they're being chased by a psychotic king who enjoys imprisoning sex slaves in his spare time and stuffing the dead bodies of his enemies into artful poses, but what is that compared with the age-old animosity that cake lovers have faced from their crust-loving foe?

Juliet, a bounty hunter, bakes pies for fun. It's about the only typically "girly" thing she does, besides wear the most gravity-defying push-up bras known to Human-kind (or any species-kind). She makes a superb cherry pie, and her budding romance with Ragnar almost comes to a screeching halt when he declares himself a cake man. That's not the worst thing a romance hero can say on the first date (that would probably be "My genital bumps are no big deal. The doc says they'll go away in a month or two, tops!" or "Don't you think you've had enough fried cheese sticks?"), but it's close. Good thing Ragnar and Juliet have the super-hot-to-trots for each other, or yet another love would be torn asunder by baked goods. When will the madness end?!

Where do you come down on the great pie vs. cake debate? Would you be willing to date inter-dessert-ly? And is cheesecake a cake or a pie?

Personally, my name is Lucy Woodhull, and I am a cake girl. I had to take a huge leap of faith in creating a "pie" heroine because pies are so very inferior to cakes in every possible way. My husband's favorite dessert is a pumpkin pie. I know. WTF, right? But I love him anyway. He's got a great butt, and if that's not as important as chocolate cake, then the world just doesn't make sense.

Tell me your cake (or pie, I guess) story in the comments. Leave it anonymously if you fear retribution from the horrible pie people. I'll pick my favorite defense of cake or pie (and yes, I can be fair in my judgment. Mostly.) and that person will win a free copy of RAGNAR AND JULIET.

If you’d like to buy my book (and I think that’s a wise decision), it's available from Liquid Silver Books ( Here's a short blurb and a link to a sample.


Bounty hunting is usually so easy. Flash a little cleavage, mix a roofie cocktail, and Juliet has her man right where she wants him: out cold, ready to be swapped for cash. Her passions are freedom, trashy clothes, and pie -- not necessarily in that order.

Hunky alien ship captain Ragnar doesn't deserve torture at the hands of the psychotic king who hired Juliet; he liberated one of William the Nefarious' illegal concubines. Juliet can't ignore such a noble act. She doesn’t trust men, but this one, with the kindest smile she's ever seen, picks away at her resolve to stay aloof and clothed. He's just so...nice! Crazy she can deal with; sincerity is terrifying.

Before she gives in to her irrational urge to get a timeshare with him (and his cute tail), they're caught by the bad guys. Ragnar disappears and abandons her to her disgusting captors -- so much for togetherness. Perhaps he’s not such a saint. Even worse, Nefarious William (who prefers "Bob") has nominated her for Concubine of the Evening. This dubious honor does not thrill her, and only a few hours remain before the king’s mind-altering drugs obliterate her free will.

Sexual slavery might not be fatal, but Juliet would rather die. Of course, the third option (run away to a beach and hump Ragnar silly) is the best, if they can live that long.

Thank you so much, Killer Fiction, for hosting me today!

Yours in Cake Solidarity,

Lucy Woodhull


Barbara E. said...

Hey, my favorite dessert is pumpkin pie too! So don't knock it, LOL. I always ask for pumpkin pie instead of cake because my birthday is Nov. 1 and it's an autumn kind of dessert.
Ragnar and Juliet sounds like a great read and I'm looking forward to reading it.

traveler said...

What an interesting and thought provoking post. Your book sounds compelling and memorable. My favorite dessert is lemon pie. It is light, fluffy, easily digestible and so darn good. Cakes are heavy, sometimes too dry and boring.

Lucy Woodhull said...

Barbara, my husband thinks you have excellent taste! I do love pumpkin in the fall.

Traveler, I adore lemon desserts!

Thanks both of you for commenting! I'll choose a winner at the end of the weekend.

Lucy Woodhull said...

Sorry for the delay folks - I've been traveling for a couple of days and reliable wifi has been hard to come by.

And the winner is... traveler! Thanks so much for commenting! Email me at LucyWoodhull [at] gmail [dotcom] and I'll send you the book. Hope you enjoy it!