Wednesday, September 03, 2008

Requiem









I guess it's fitting that in the Fall, plants die. And while I expected the demise of Al, the Space Plant (may he rest in peace), I certainly didn't expect my cactus, Bob, the Succulent (isn't that fun to say?) to die as well. This is par for the course. People who know me also know that I cannot keep plants alive. Apparently I have a quota on the living things thing. One husband, two kids, two dogs, two cats, two guinea pigs and 24 Girl Scouts are all I'm allowed.

There was a time in my life, when to discourage my friends from giving me plants, I kept a hanging something by the sink in the kitchen. It died, because that's what plants do in my presence. Even though it had plenty of light and access to water (being next to the sink and all). I kept that dead plant for two years to remind myself not to take on any more. People thought I was a psychopath, but it worked.

Imagine my surprise to find Bob lying on his side, life eaking from his prickly body. I killed a cactus. I may be the only person on earth who can kill something that can survive in Hell-like conditions. I wonder what that says about me?

I guess the Summer of Plant Weirdness is finally over. All I have to look forward to next year is seeing what strange things come up in the Spring. Personally, I can't wait.

The Plant Assasin

17 comments:

Keri Ford said...

Maybe you gave the cactus too good of a life and it just couldn't survive in the heaven like conditions (you know, since he was born expecting to be treated terribly).

Hey! You killed him with kindness!

Leslie Langtry said...

Keri, Hmmmm....I wonder if there's a way the Bombay's could kill someone with kindness... food for thought. Just, apparently, not for the cactus. ;)

Gemma Halliday said...

Aw, poor Bob!
(By the way, I love that you name your plants. I totally used to do that... then they all died on me. It was too depressing.)

Leslie Langtry said...

Gemma, I think you make a valid point. Maybe in naming my plants, I'm dooming them to a certain death?

terrio said...

The one constant in my house is no plants. I can't keep them alive. Not sure why. I have been able to keep two plants alive in my office but they usually have to droop completely over before I remember to water them.

This is just a guess as I know NOTHING about plants, but maybe Bob needs a bigger pot? I really did think it was impossible to kill a cactus. And poor Al. When he went he really went.

MsHellion said...

I've killed my cactus, Leslie. I mean, I only need to water it once a month and clearly I did it wrong. I don't think cactuses really have a will to live... They probably want to come back as a Bird of Paradise or something....

I do have an African Violet though, who seems to like me, and so far I've managed to not kill it. Going on about 5 years now, I think.

Tori Lennox said...

Alas, poor Al the Space Plant. Maybe you'll find some kids of his come spring?

I've killed a cactus before. I was rather surprised. I've got some kind of plant now that I water once a week. It's hanging over my tub. It seems to be thriving which is even more surprising than my killing a cactus. *g*

Maureen said...

I have the same problem with plants. I have concluded that it is not my fault but the problem is that the plants cannot yell at me like the kittens do at night for the food. The kittens, my children and my husband realize that I need to be reminded of things since there is just so much that needs to be done.

Estella said...

Poor Bob!
Maybe he didn't like the name you gave him.

Leslie Langtry said...

I wonder if plants commit suicide? I just wish he'd stop looking at me like that.

catslady said...

I too have killed a cactus and I'm guessing it's because I always over water the darn things lol.

Shel said...

You're not alone Leslie. My friend got me a cactus because you cannot kill them, but kill it I did...

It's a good thing I do not have kids.

Elisabeth Naughton said...

Hee hee. I'm a plant killer too. Ithink I'm down to one - maybe two - living plants in the house. The only reason they survive is because the DH takes care of them.

I have a 36 yr old Christmas cactus sitting on my desk. It was a cutting from the cactus my grandmother gave my mother, when good ol' grams flew out west to spend the month with my mother before I was born. Needless to say, the Christmas cactus was a peace offering because they didn't get along so well during that month. The funny part about this story is that damn cactus generally only flowers in November (around my birthday), but every flippin' time I've been pregnant, it's flowered at unusual times (like in the spring or summer, when I've GOTTEN pregnant). The last time it happened (4 yrs ago) I thought there was something wrong with the plant, then wammo...a week later I found out I was pregnant. Needless to say...that plant is on it's last legs. I've stopped watering it. The DH thinks I'm being cruel, but there's NO way I'm letting that thing flower again. (Secretly, I think he's watering it. And yes, we have issues to discuss...)

Christie Craig said...

Leslie,

You have my sympathies.

May Al rest in peace.

CC

Leslie Langtry said...

Elizabeth, you might have something there with your pregnancy test cactus! Make some cuttings before it dies! Just don't glue googly eyes on it. It's just too weird. I should've known it was a bad idea when Christopher Walken suggested it...

Virginia said...

Maybe you baby your plants to much, you give them to much TLC. This could be your problem. Maybe a little less water may help. I have a plaint in my living room that I can't remember to water ofter and it is doing very well.

Jenyfer Matthews said...

mshellion reminded me of something I've noticed before - I have known any number of people who claim they kill plants, but can grow African violets just fine, while I can grow just about anything BUT an African violet! Give me an African violet (or any similar plant) and it'll be dead inside a few months. What's up with that?

RIP Bob