Wednesday, October 24, 2012

By The Power of Grayskull! A Blast from the Past - October 2008

(I decided that, in honor of Halloween, I'd revive my favorite Halloween blog here at KF.  Your welcome.)
So what did I end up going as? Well, I was pretty sure I couldn't pull off Jennifer Beals. But just before the party I had a flash of inspiration. I went as a 42-year old, disgruntled Strawberry Shortcake. Here I am in costume with my friend Michele, who went as a Ghostbuster. Don't I look disgruntled? Doesn't she look adorable with a vacuum hose in her son's backpack?

It was great. I had a whole backstory and everything. Basically, in the late '80's I was down-sized due to a three-rock a day crack habit and a scandal at Studio 34 involving 3 circus clowns, a gallon of everclear and a bicycle lock. 
I married He-Man in the early '90's and divorced him (mainly because Mr. Assassin refused to go as a middle-aged, disgruntled He-Man) in the late '90's because I got sick of hearing "By the power of Greyskull" by the so-called "Master of the Universe" in bed - all the time. Well, that and he was cheating on me with Jem AND the Holograms (those whores).

I kicked drugs shortly after and am now just your average, garden-variety alcoholic. I hate the smell of strawberry, which sucks because my hair smells like that all the time, no matter what I do. These days I work a few kids parties and as an occaisional "escort" just to keep vodka on the table.

By the way, my friends thought it was weird that I had a developed back-story. Non-writers, eh?

(This was my editor's favorite blog of mine.  Hope you enjoyed it!)
The Assassin 


Robin Kaye said...

OMG! That's too funny! I loved the backstory!

Terri Osburn said...

LOL! I love this. And that disgruntled Shortcake is drinking wine. Of course she is. I'm trying to convince kiddo and her friend to go to the school dance as hipster Disney Princesses. With attitudes like they had in the Shrek movie.

Leslie Langtry said...

Thanks Robin! And Terri - not only should you convince them, but film them too. I'd pay to see that.

Brandy said...

What's a costume without a backstory? Loved yours, hilarious!