Sgt. Assassin Does BaghdadOnly 2.5 months until Tom comes home! I can't believe it's been a year already. How the hell did I survive? Here are a few thoughts about his impending return...
- I've become a dude. Some kind of mother/father amalgam weirdness. Need proof? Conor, Louis' older brother, told me the other day, "Leslie, you're more one of the guys than some of the guys in my class." I asked him if that was a compliment. He said, "Oh yeah!" Well, it's nice to know...I guess...
-I outweigh Sgt. Assassin. "Hey!" He tells me in an email, "I've lost like 40lbs and am comin home svelte and studly for you!" I tell him he can borrow my clothes, since I've gained 10-15lbs from stress eating while he's gone.
-My 11-yr. old daughter can make dinner! I came home to find she'd popped a frozen lasagna in the oven and it was almost done. "Look!" She said excitedly, "I even set the digital timer on the microwave!" She points to the countdown. "We have a timer on the microvave???" I ask in shock. She did a great job too. Well, except the lasagna was face down on a cookie sheet...but who's complaining?
-Bassett hounds do not consider the woman of the household to be a replacement for the alpha male. On the good side, this is the one reference to me being a woman in this whole blog. On the downside, I have 70lbs. of stupid dogmeat that won't listen to me and gets into the garbage, pantry and countersurfs on a daily basis.
All of this tells me one thing. I need a girly, spa, purse shopping spree when that man gets back. And he'd BETTER tell me I look thin!
The Assassin
I say we plan a girly, spa, purse shopping spree at Nationals. I bet we could do the whole thing without even leaving the hotel.
ReplyDeleteI can't believe it's been a year either. Wow, where did the time go? But YEAH FOR MR. ASSASSIN COMING HOME!
Your dog sounds like my cat, minus about 60lbs. I can't keep him out of the cupboards and he won't leave anything on a solid surface alone. Half the knick-knacks in my house are on the floor.
My cat does that too. Put something shiny on a counter/table/surface and it's on the floor in minutes.
ReplyDeleteYEAH for Mr. Assassin coming back home!! And YEAH for girly spa days with lots of shopping and wine!!
ReplyDeleteI am alpha in my house, but this is because I live alone and have no pets.
Sigh...I want to be an alpha in my own home. I don't even frighten the plants.
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